Even though I could hardly speak a word.
That's a very interesting point to bring up. It seems you hear so often that if you lose weight you'll magically have more friends, that perfect job opportunity will come up, you'll have more money, etc. But you rarely (if ever) hear from someone who has lost weight and suddenly life was perfect. In fact, most people eventually wind up right back where they started.
I think the key is that you have to discover something about yourself that you like and build on that. Everyone has something, it's just finding it that seems to be the problem.
I don't think it's people afraid to be happy as much as it is people not knowing when or what to be happy about.
Example, you leave for work before the sun is up, if you are driving East the only good thing about the sunrise is that it is a little warmer.
I think that is one of the reasons I developed my ED.
But you are making progress toward
My "key" is to remind myself of the difference between "need" and "want".
Recently a good friend, chronically obese with her illnesses