SJ - Where I go from here

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Registered: 05-08-2006
SJ - Where I go from here
Wed, 11-21-2012 - 6:43pm

Thanksgiving Eve...I have a lot to be Thankful for, and yet I have a lot of work to do on myself.  On Monday, I am going to Poland for three months.  I have many goals for this time, the biggest being to not wasttithe opportunity.  I feel like I have been coasting along for a while, a long while.  Somewhere on this journey, I weighed 159.5 pounds..but I couldn't hold that weight.  Not sure when that was, but I am on that slippery slope where I gain a little, lose a little for a while.  I have beenaround 178.8 for a while although lately I am backband forth between 179 and 180.   My mom died almost two years ago, and was dieting for the two years before that.  In the middle of that, I broke my foot and it didn't heal well...even after surgery I still have significantdiscomfort and sometimes pain most of the time.  That has all caused me to lose focus but not give up everything.  I continue to work out, relatively intensely, and I eat some level of healthy,but way too much crap.  Mostly, I am struggling with people in my life...I am an emotional eater and the more people disappoint me, the more I punish myself with food.  And to protect myself from disappointment, I isolate myself..and then I feel bad that I am isolated.  I am close to retirement...not there yet but close enough to be thinking about what life I want when I get there.