Hello again

Avatar for poorboy2011
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-02-2011
Hello again
Fri, 03-08-2013 - 12:52am

By now I'm sure I didn't get a job this year. Right now, the only remaining possibility is if the negotiation with the person they offered the job to falls through unexpectedly. That happens once in a while, but not often at all. While everyone would feel bad in such a situation, I feel particularly bad because I tried so hard. I was sick during the long, arduous interview trips (the interview in my field lasts for days, and I am basically constantly talking, constantly being observed), but I was so good. I tried and tried even though I felt not so good.

So I have to spend another year in this toxic place. Fortunately the College is dismantling my department, so yay!!!! The good thing is that I can be more removed from my department.

I am a little frustrated by the slowness of the reimbursement checks. They should add up to about $1,000. So what's holding up the money?? That's why I'm not updating my ticker.

I can't help but look at my upcoming expenditures. My dental costs are adding up. I fear I'll reach the annual maximum soon, and after that I'll pay to pay every cent. I still have one more crown to get. At least I have a supernice dentist. I'm going to get an MRI for my shoulder. I hope I won't have to get surgery. If so, I guess I'll reach the annual maximum, after which I won't have to pay. I have some trips (both professional and personal). I feel like I should crunch some numbers to get a sense of how big of a setback I'll have this year.

I also have to get my mind in the right place to finish writing my book. I'll need it to get a job next year.


iVillage Member
Registered: 10-01-2008
Fri, 03-08-2013 - 10:13am

I'm so sorry that job didn't pan out.  My husband went through a similar thing several years ago.  Also the dental thing.  We maxed out his dental last year and he has work he needs to schedule on his lower teeth but his job is super busy right now.  

Can you try for another position somewhere else before one year?????  Don't totally give up. Keep your eyes and ears open.  Think positive.  Hope your shoulder is not too bad.  

Avatar for poorboy2011
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-02-2011
Fri, 03-08-2013 - 12:13pm

The hiring cycle is like the academic calendar. So it's like applying to school: you can do it once a year. This year is done.

My shoulder is fine for everyday stuff. But I'm active. Having a bad shoulder is limiting, and makes me feel so bad sometimes.

Community Leader
Registered: 08-25-2006
Fri, 03-08-2013 - 12:52pm

All any of us can do is take the action and let go of the results.  

A rough quote from a story in the book Alcoholics Anonymous:  We never sit and do nothing and wait for God to tell us what to do.  We do what is in front of us and leave the results up to Him.

Even if a person is not spiritual, it is still clear that a job is probably not going to fall into your lap if no one knows you are looking.  It takes action.  What is hard is to let go and keep taking the action, even when we don't get results as fast as we would like.  

You are at that school for a reason.  You may never know why, but whether it be that you are positively influencing your students, or there are hard lessons you needed to learn, it is all for a reason.  

If you don't mind me asking, I forget what the story is with your immediate family.  I don't recall you speaking of any family, or anywhere you consider "home."  If you don't want to share, that is fine.  Smile

Serenity - CL Making a Second Marriage Work

Avatar for poorboy2011
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-02-2011
Fri, 03-08-2013 - 2:47pm

Serenity -- Thanks for the concern. Academia doesn't work like any other profession. A statement like "a job is probably not going to fall into your lap if no one knows you are looking" doesn't apply too well. All the jobs in a particular field (and there aren't that many of them) are advertised in the same venue in the same annual cycle. Applications are generally solicited internationally. In other words, this is an open, public competition. So there are no "secret" openings that I wouldn't know about, except for the equivalent of temp jobs.

So is this like the Olympics? No, because the hire is generally made on political grounds. I don't mean Democrats vs. Republicans, but I mean the interpersonal politics of the individual department, which is utterly, utterly unpredictable. I am speaking from experience because I have served on search committees (i.e., I hired people). So at the end, it's really like winning the lottery, even though everyone will pretend that they hired the best person for the job.

Would the personal factor help? (I am guessing this is a part of your thinking.) If you know people at a place, are they more likely to hire you? This is a case-by-case matter. Because an academic field is often very small, you basically know everyone who is any good. For instance, for one position, I competed against a classmate whom my roommate tried to date, a new friend whose advisor's husband slept with my girlfriend (this happened years ago), and someone I don't actually know -- but I know his advisor, who thinks I'm cute. Is it possible for a job to be created for a certain person, so the skill sets required are exactly that person's skill sets? Yes, but then there are also cases where as soon as the prospective employer found a better match, they rejected the person they created the job for. Sometimes it's a lot like dating.

People on this forum have been very caring and enthusiastic in supporting me in all sorts of different ways, and I deeply appreciate that. I need support, but I don't need advice about my profession. Please don't take this the wrong way.

As for why I ended up where I am, that's typically the sort of question that would a lot of soul searching to find meaning. But it's very much worth thinking about.

To answer your final question, I don't have a family. When I posted to accountability, sometimes I invented a DW and DD. (At one point I got another DD, I think). I have a place I live in, but it's not home.

Avatar for turtleemom
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-25-2007
Fri, 03-08-2013 - 3:27pm

You're a teacher or a professor, PhD? Can you take your expertise and turn it into a researcher for a museum?  Can you teach online classes through a different 'school' in the evenings?  What about private high schools or prep schools? 

 I have a hard time believing that all professors for all private and public colleges (roughly 4,000 including community colleges) hire only in spring. When my BIL, professor PhD, was ready to start teaching it  it took him a year and a half to secure a postion, but he was interviewing all over the country  in spring, summer, and fall for a variety of institutions, all for teaching positions. This was just a couple of years ago. 

Is there a specific tier of school you are only looking at?  Do you have a specialized area that only certain schools would offer courses in? 

Community Leader
Registered: 08-25-2006
Fri, 03-08-2013 - 6:13pm

Hi PB, 

Okay, I think my perspective got lost in translation somewhere.  But that is okay.  I was simply speaking to the "big picture."  Innocent   Sorry if using your details as an example threw you off.  


Avatar for poorboy2011
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-02-2011
Fri, 03-08-2013 - 10:18pm


Yes, I can use my expertise for something else. I can teach online classes, I can teach prep schools. Sure, these are all good suggestions. But I don't need to consider these options right now. As you are aware from your BIL's experience, it takes a while to get an academic position. I have no reason to hurry, because I will have my current job for another year. In the meanwhile, I can think about these options for when I go on the market next year.

As for the hiring cycle, I know it's very hard to believe. I've spent many years explaining how this works to my friends and family, and like you, they don't believe me. I actually know my profession quite well. I have been on both sides of the fence for more than 10 years, so I know how it works.

Are there positions that interview "out of season"? Yes, but they either tend to be undesirable jobs, or they tend to be in disciplines that hire clinical professors. I think community colleges may work that way as well, but Marie can speak to it with more authority. I know little about community colleges, and I have no chance at getting a community college job. That brings me to answer another one of your questions. I'm looking primarily for first-tier positions or for positions in large cities in the northeast or in California. My profile is such that I'm competitive only for competitive jobs, but that doesn't mean those jobs are any less competitive.  

I think I'm OK with not getting a job this year, since I still have a job next year. It was just a gruelling experience, and thanks to everyone here for the support and the hugs! I like getting female sympathy. I'm more worried about the upcoming expenditures. I struggle between feeling like perhaps I can put off the dental care or the shoulder MRI, and knowing that early treatment is the best route. Maybe my crown can last another year. Maybe I can just put up with the shoulder pain. I mean, it's not bad or anything. At the same time, I am afraid that if I put things off, I'll end up in a worse situation. I'm surely not the only one who feels like he/she has to gamble on his/her health.

I also would like to take some trips to see friends, and I think you guys can help me with this. Again, I feel like I'm calculating the worth of friendship. I need to spend an x amount of money for the trips. Is that worth it to see some friends I love? With health I have a good excuse, but with friendship it's a really big struggle. How do you decide?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2010
In reply to: ktqt07
Sat, 03-09-2013 - 7:11am

You explained the jobs and academics part so I won't even go there other then to say, I hope next year works out better.

Personally, given all you have posted, I think spending the money to be near people you love would be worth it.  Even if you can only see one friend.  I'm taking an unpaid week off at the end of this month and taking my little one to go see my family and my friends back "home" because I'm getting borderline depressed here with my husbands continuous deployments.  If you need the mental break, you need it.  As long as taking the trip won't cause more mental anguish and worry than it will relive, you sound like you need the break.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2008
Sat, 03-09-2013 - 11:32am

Hi Poorboy

I tried to private message you three times but it didnt work.. Anyway.. I read your post and I am t hinking if you want I do know a few professors and other folks in Academia here in New York ..

If you want and its up to you and I dont mind I could ask them if they know of any positions anywhere. There are a few of them I know on facebook also...

I am just an Ivillage member but feel for you as I read your posts.. You said you want to live in Northeast so NY is Northeast right? (lol)

hey; let me know okay.. doesnt hurt to ask..

PM me as It didnt work for me but might work for you....

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2008
Sun, 03-10-2013 - 1:29pm

I think it is sad that Americans have to choose between their health and other things. Healthcare coverage should cover you...

If you miss your friends and need to see them for your mental health, then it is a question of physical vs mental health. I see that as an easy question.

Now for the tough love part. I know you are capable of reading the tone of genuine care that I put into this...but!

Do you have a plan for the next 2 years? For the next 5 years? Do you have your financial goals clearly outlined?

Often you will say, "I'm okay with not worrying about it." If you let the current take you where it may, you will end up down river...that is only okay if you want to be down river! You seem to end up in places/environment/situations that maybe you would not want to be in. Time to start steering this boat! You are the captain of your destiny! (please excuse the cheesiness and just pair it with a nice red wine)

If I were your friend, and this is why I don't have friends I would feel compelled to help you. I know you are going to reply that you are not asking for my help and you don't need my help...but as the others have proven, your unique style of communication reaches out to us. People jump on here and want to offer you career advice because of this. We "hear" something there that envokes the need to nurture. Please excuse us as we are women Tongue Out

Use as a resource and start taking control. We are here and more than happy to help.