Progress and no progress :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2008
Progress and no progress :)
4
Fri, 11-30-2012 - 7:27pm

So as I mentioned on another thread, our montly deficit is going from $90/mo to $477/mo in January. We also an unexpected $600 car bill last month so it has been a bit of a struggle.

My second income options are very limited bc I have a highly professional job. You can't really be a high level manager and take on waitressing at the local pub! grr...DH has been unable to find ANYTHING - well, he and DS1 delivered phone books one w/end and earned $100 - but nothing consistent. I even took on the northern part of our province as my territory bc you can't make it there and back in a "normal" day so business trips usually include overtime. But they have cancelled any overtime!

That is the no progress. The progress is that DH and I both got 2% raises as of Dec. Not much but every bit helps. Also, I have been doing mystery shopper gigs and website reviews to earn another $100/month. Again, not much! DH is getting 25 hours/week up from 20 hours/week.

But Feb, Dh sees a $1/hr raise. Mar, we both get 1% raises, etc.

So I just keep telling myself this is going to get better!

I just feel like a terrible mother. My kids can't do recreational courses or lessons. DS2 has no winter/rain boots (it rained 23 days in Nov here). DS1 only has 4 pairs of pants that fit him. Etc. You can only buy no clothings and things for so long. We bought DS1 his boots at a second hand store but there was nothing for the little guy.

All my extra money goes to "date nights" twice a month but I feel like after working 12 hour days & the extra side stuff, I need it for my sanity.

I am considering cashing in some retirement savings to ease things a bit. We are also considering selling our home and renting (it would be cheaper and we would pay off the car loans)...

Once DH is working FT this will all be an unpleasant distant memory. The silver lining is that it has given me the push to go back and finish a degree I started in 1998~!

Haha,

Dee

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-14-2008
Sat, 12-01-2012 - 12:48pm

Dee!

Don't say that, I don't like it! You are are wonderful mother! Take a step back and don't be selling your house until there is a last resort. See how the raises and extra income pans out with cutting back.

I know you have a sinking feeling right now with running the numbers but it may not be as bad as you think. 

Continue to think outside the box as you are and see how Jan and Feb play out.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Sat, 12-01-2012 - 5:33pm

Are there any consignment shops for kids' clothes near where you live--or even in Goodwill or thrift type stores sometimes they have good clothes.  My 17 yr old son went to a Goodwill store & bought some wool sweaters for about $1 each--not cause he couldn't afford better clothes, because he thought it was fun.  I don't know how old your kids are but sometimes they have free things to do sponsored by your town--maybe the school or the library.  There are many kids whose families can't afford to do private lessons--your kids have food & a house to live in so you aren't being a terrible mother.  I mean my exH grew up in a family of 6 kids--their dad was a mailman and mom didn't work cause she had to take care of the kids.  He's always joking around about how "poor" they were but it sure didn't make him not love his parents.  Good luck with getting raises.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2008
Sat, 12-01-2012 - 11:30pm

Thanks for the encouragement. We are thinking of moving to a slightly smaller community closer to DH's work so he can bicycle to work. The plan would be rent intially and then buy once we figure out the lay of the land. Plus, we are keeping our eyes peeled for jobs in two rural neighbourhoods to which Dh can transfer his job. It's just my job that is the problem. So renting would give us the flexibility to JUMP on any opportunities should they arise!

We would just be speeding up the plan. We can rent a whole house w/backyard where DH works. We don't have a backyard and I don't want the kids to go another year w/o one. If they aren't attending recreational activities, it makes it more important.

Feeling better tho - DH is at work right now getting a couple more hours :)

Dee

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2008
Sat, 12-01-2012 - 11:35pm

Ironically we live in an upscale neighhourhood and the second store gets cleaned out quickly! You see mercedes and bmws in the parking lot.

I am thinking of driving over to another neighbourhood with more modest means to see if they have anything for DS2.

Also, I buy most of the kids clothes from craigslist. DS1 wore size 2-4 clothes from a garbage bag I bought for $23. DS2 is now starting to wear them too. I am terribly frugal. It would be nice to go and buy the boys new clothes - DS1 is constantly asking as he has figured out most of his clothes are second hand :(

Thanks

Dee