Hello my old friends! My life never seems to stop changing!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2006
Hello my old friends! My life never seems to stop changing!
Mon, 08-06-2012 - 7:56am
Well, it's been awhile since I've been here! But I'm happy to see so many friendly names still posting! I am in the midst of crisis really! I found out 5 weeks ago that I'm expecting baby #4 and I nearly died of shock in that one moment! Birth control methods can all fail I guess! DH was actually in the process of scheduling his vasectomy when I found out. I was and really still am devastated! After this I don't know if I'll ever trust birth control. Even a vasectomy is not fool proof. Maybe I'll get myself fixed too! Anyway, I'm dealing with the fact that another child is coming. I have three boys already ages 4,8 and 13. AND we arein the process of moving to my mothers house which is empty. She needed somebody to rent it and we needed a cheaper place to live. It is very small but in my opinion financial security trumps space any day of the week! I'm excited to have financial freedom but I'm scared of all the changes this house will force on us. We are in full 'sell everything' mode right now. We'll be moving in in two weeks. None of my larger furniture is going to work and we need to think multi purpose and storage for everything we own. And on top of all of that, I'm absolutely miserable. I hate being pregnant! I'm sick, tired, in pain and have indigestion of all sorts! It's lovely. I just got on zofran for the nausea and that was a god send, but I definitely am not in the place i need to be to move! My husband and mother are doing everything. I could say so mch more but my back hurts! I miss you guys! OH and my big financial woes right now is that I have to pay off our car so that we can start saving for a MINIVAN! OMG, I need a minivan now! Abbie
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-10-2003
Glad to "see" you again Abbie! I was thinking about you the other day and wondering how things were in your neck of the woods. CONGRATS on the baby. I'm sure it was a shock and a half, but its still a blessing (maybe you'll get a girl to help balance out all the testosterone???)
Keep posting. We miss you!

Bex -

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-14-2008

Hi Abbie!

I have been wondering about you. I wondered about moving to your moms. I knew that was an option. Sounds better than trying to heat/cool the big house. I think this is good. 

CONGRATS on the baby. I just had a baby girl on July 14th. Maybe you will get one too. That or a bigger reason to have the other ones baby sitt so you can go have some girl time out of the house at some point. Such a blessing. You guys will be ok and deal with it just fine. I bet you are trying to get deals on baby things already. I added a package of diapers, or bottles or soothers etc every time I went grocery shopping to prepare so I didn't have to get everything at once and spread out the cost. As well I made some frozen meals so we didnt' have to get take out etc when the baby came. It was most helpful. Can you visit some garage sales to get some baby items you will need like a crib etc now while they are still going on? When are you due?

Mini vans are good on fuel and can often be a good price. Look hard and well and you will find one that works for you. Good luck getting the other car paid off. 

I am thinking of you and your family. Post more often!


Community Leader
Registered: 08-25-2006

Abbie, we miss you! 

Glad you are moving.  If I remember correctly, this move was really going to make sense for you. 

I can see why this preganancy was not a joyful discovery.  We all know that after we deliver we can't imagine our life without this baby, but I want to acknowledge you discouragement and know that I believe it is totally understandable. 

I think both of you getting "fixed" is a good idea (based on your post).  Schedule it for after your delivery while you are in the hospital already.   Have your hubby do his while you are pregnant. 

Oh, I remember trading in my Honda, that I loved, when I had my third child for a minivan.  Ugh...I didn't like it much either.  But you know what, I ended up actually loving how roomy the van was.  We got a "short" one. Not much cargo room, but it was nice that it wasn't any longer than my car.  You will love having that third row seat.

I hope you are able post more often.  We always love hearing from you!



iVillage Member
Registered: 10-01-2008

Hey Abbie,

So nice to see you back on the board.  Congrats on the baby and I'm pulling for a girl this time! 

You had spoke last year of downsizing & moving into your mother's place.  So many people are doing that these days.  Less is more!  Abbie the electric bills have been horrible in that big old house.  You will save enough money to be able to afford that used van in no time flat.  I can't remember if you said it was a two bedroom or three?  Do I remember there was an unfinished basement? 

Put you mind to work Abbie.  Let your mom & hubby do a the physical labor.  It's a good move for you & your family.  The boys will still have the great outdoors.  Much better than that old condo.



"Patience is the best remedy for every trouble"- Plautus

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-24-2007
Hi Abby, nice to hear from you!

I can well imagine that the pregnancy was a shock, but congatulations all the same! As serenity said, once they are born, you can't imagine life without them. I'm hoping you have a girl. ;-)

The move to your Mom's place sounds like it makes good financial sense. You won't have the change the boys school, will you? And your music students will still be able to get to your new home?

Take care of yourself Abby!


empty purse

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2006
I can't believe you had a baby!!! I missed so much! A whole pregnancy! Congratulations!

I'm not too worried about the baby expenses. I'm not buying anything until I know what it is and I'll find that out on October 12th (hopefully)! Since our house is so small, we really only need the essentials and my friends have already told me (even when I told them not too) that they are having a baby shower for me. I'll probably get all the clothes I need right there! As far as baby furniture goes, we are going very specific with furniture. I have to think SMALL! I'm looking at this European space saving crib that works until 2 years old and it's about $350. Except for a stroller and carseat, I don't think I'll have room for big baby items! OH and I breastfeed for the 1st year so no cost there AND I cloth diaper so only about $500 dollars initial cost there for the entire pre potty training years. I wish I wouldn't have sold all of my cloth diapers, but I NEVER thought I'd be doing this again.

Thanks everyone for the good wishes!
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2006
I agree, it will be much better than our condo! The school district is amazing. The highschool ranks 399th in the entire country!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2006
We will have to change schools. And I won't be able to do piano lessons in such a small house and driving to my lessons doesn't make much financial sense anymore. I've decided that piano lessons just don't seem to fit into my life right now and I'm working on phazing them out somehow. I haven't done a single lesson this whole summer since I've been sick! It's also going to be really hard to work with 4 kids! Moving to this house means that I don't have to worry so much about making money. I think I'm going to be a full time stay at home mom once this kid is born...except I'll still be the music director at my church because that is very family friendly and doesn't take up much time. That money will pretty much get me groceries and that's it. It's definitely going to be HUGE transition all around!