Help me please!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-01-2003
Help me please!!
Sat, 09-03-2011 - 5:55am

Hi ladies, I'm new here and need some advice and support.


iVillage Member
Registered: 10-28-2009
Sat, 09-03-2011 - 12:26pm

Hi cinnamon rose, welcome. so sorry to hear all the stress and sleepless nights you are going through.

Does your BF know the extent of your financial troubles? If not, I would sit down together and go over the bills and show him the reason for needing assisstance, and needing him to participate in helping to get it.

Is it possible for the two of you to work full time, but opposite shifts? so, you can continue to care for your children at home, but have 2 fuill time paychecks coming in? if not, is it possible for you to work overtime, get a second job? Even if it's only temporary? I also suggest going through all the stuiff you have at home......Can you have a yard sale? Have jewelry you can sell, esp. gold.

If you'd like to post ypur income and bills here, it's nice sometimes to have different points of view take a look, see if there are places you can cut back.

Most importantly, hang in there, don't lose hope. You can get out of this!

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-31-2010
Tue, 09-06-2011 - 10:08am

Welcome to the board.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-09-1999
Tue, 09-06-2011 - 1:47pm

sorry you are going thru such a tuff time right now.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-09-1999
Tue, 09-06-2011 - 1:49pm
I forgot, if you are getting large tax refunds EVERY year, then you need to adjust your withholding status. Contact your employer & fill out a new W-4. There is no reason to let the government use your money every month, when you could instead be using that money every month in your paycheck to help you make ends meet. Please check into is YOUR money!!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-12-2008
Tue, 09-13-2011 - 1:40am
Hi, cinnamon_rose, I checked the state assistance PA websites that can help you. First, there is the COMPASS site URL:
which allows you to apply online for food stamps, utility aid, medical insurance, etc. Your case could qualify as an emergency depending upon income and you could receive immediate benefits within 5 days. Second, when you filled out your prior year's taxes, did you qualify for the Earned Income Tax Credit? Most people who do their own taxes with dependent children miss this important credit. Depending upon income, you could receive up to $2100 for each year in addition to your tax refund. If you did not take this credit, you can go to the website to fill out an amended form for prior years. The IRS URL is and the 1040X form is located at Check your 2010 and 2009 returns.
Speaking of tax refunds, if you received more than $1,000 refund on your taxes, you can increase your exemptions to increase your monthly income. The rule of thumb is to increase exemptions by 1 for every $1,000 refunded to you.

Is your boyfriend on the title of the mortgage or deed? If not, then you don't need his income statements because he is not responsible for payment. He would just be listed as other income if he contributes his paycheck to paying for food, utilities, gas, etc.
I do not recommend cashing out a life insurance policy because if something happened to you, how will your kids live? Cashing out a 401K is not good either because it boosts your income which may disqualify you from state assistance programs for the next year.
If you post more detail about your income and monthly expenses, many people can help you.