Help! Adjusting to cat
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| Mon, 11-22-2004 - 8:48pm |
I'm a little nervous about posting this, but I don't know who else to ask, I hope you'll bear with me?!
I recently adopted a 4 year old cat. (two weeks ago) I think he's adjusting better than I am! He greets me at the door and sleeps on my lap and is basically one big huge love muffin. The problem is me! I grew up with cats and have always wanted to have one now that I live by myself. I'm trying so hard to accept him into my life, but I worry about going away on vacation, and I worry about him getting sick. (I should also tell you I have depression and anxiety... :P )I find that even though I like having him around, it still feels like I'm cat sitting, that he's not really mine, and that he'll never really be mine. Is it normal to feel this way? I thought I would LOVE LOVE LOVE him right away, but all I think is I like him a lot and he's really sweet. I feel like a fraud.
I'm wondering if I should return him to his foster mom (who adored him). I know he's happy and I do play with him and interact with him to make sure he's a happy kitty, but I'm a very confused and anxious kitty mom...
HELP!

Well, keep in mind that HE loves YOU! Like you said, he greets you and sleeps on your lap. Sleeping on your lap shows that he completely trusts you and is at ease with his surroundings. Otherwise, he would NOT be doing that.
I do think it's completely natural to not love him instantly. In general, I don't think love is supposed to be instant. When I got my cat, we had a time of getting to know each other and both were weary of each other. I wasn't sure of cats at all and she had been traumatized so it took us probably about a month to bond. Now she's my little "love muffin" and parks herself on my lap whenever she gets a chance. (She's an outdoor cat who lives with my dad and is only let into the house when I'm out there.)
Perhaps there are deeper issues here for you? I'm not trying to be nosy or offend you, but I suffer from depression as well and I can obsess about my pets sometimes. It's usually a sign that I don't want to deal with other issues and when I'm feeling really low, I have a tendency to think that I'm not being a good furmommy.
I think you should give yourself a break. It's a life changing thing to adopt a pet. I'm sure you will grow to love him in time. Good luck and try not to worry! I know how hard that is to do sometimes. Just deal with things as they come up. That's the best that you can do and your kitty only expects attention and food everyday anyways.
Michelle
Hi Redsh0e.