My best friend is gone

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2003
My best friend is gone
4
Wed, 02-17-2010 - 9:49am

It all started when Buddy tore a ligament in his knee and needed surgery. He was 12 years old and my gut said that surgery was a really bad idea. I was so afraid he would not survive. But he came thru just great, and was recovering well. And then, little more than a week later, it all went bad - fast!

They tell me there is no connection to the surgery, even though they don't really know what happened. None of the blood tests or x-rays pointed to anything specific. But one week from when he started to look bad and act different, he was hemorrhaging into his belly, started convulsing and it was too late to save him.

I feel so much anger, and so much pain. I know he was 12 years old, but he still acted like a puppy. No one who saw him believed he was as old as he was. He was never sick, he was such a good little dog, and my heart is breaking.

We were always together, all day long, he sat on my computer desk, watching out the window, protecting me from the dogs that walked by, while I worked. He slept in my bed. He sat outside the shower waiting for me. Every minute of my day seemed to involve him - and I feel so lost and alone without him.

Buddy was a Bichon Frise, we had him since he was 4 months old - he turned 12 years old on Nov 8/09. Buddy has so much personality, everyone remarked on it that knew him!

Saying good-bye to him was the hardest thing I have ever done.



~*~ Catherine, mom to Jason, Michael & Joshua


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~*~ Catherine, mom to three grown men - Jason, Michael & Joshua and Granma to Christopher & Leia.


iVillage Member
Registered: 02-09-2010
Thu, 02-18-2010 - 8:05pm

Dear Buddy's Mom,


So very sorry to read of your best pal's passing.

Avatar for cl_whispersmom
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Sun, 02-21-2010 - 2:57pm

{{{^Buddy's^ Mom}}}

With my heart,
 
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2003
Mon, 02-22-2010 - 3:42pm

~~If Buddy hadn't had the operation, what was his prognosis with a torn ligament? Unable to walk, limping? I don't really know, so I'm asking.~~

Thanks so much for your response! His prognosis depended on who I asked. the vets nurse made me feel that I was a bad pet parent for not wanting to do the surgery. She said that it would never heal, he would be in pain, unable to walk and would quickly develop arthritis and have to be on pain meds the rest of his life, affecting the quality of his life.

When I looked online, I saw articles that said under 10 lbs they could heal on their own, without surgery. Buddy weighed 12 lbs. So I gave in, not wanted him to suffer. Later I found articles that said up to 15 lbs and even up to 35 lbs, it could heal on it's own.

Looking at Buddy, he was getting around on 3 legs without any problems. He was one tough little dog and never let it slow him down. Because he wasn't healed yet from his surgery, he was still hopping around on 3 legs the day he died - so it was a useless surgery and made no difference to the quality of his life.

My feeling is that the stress of the surgery triggered the problem that lead to his death. I have no proof, but that is what my heart tells me.

~~Like you, just two weeks ago, I lost my 12 year old companion. ~~

{{hugs}} I am so sorry to hear that. I know that whole in the heart feeling and I wish that you had not lost your beloved JD.



~*~ Catherine, mom to Jason, Michael & Joshua


Co-CL Breastmilk vs. Formula Debate Board





Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie First Birthday tickers


No matter what decision you make in your life, or your child's life - there will always be someone just waiting to tell you what a stupid idiot you are for doing so...


Do not assume you know what the silent majority is thinking.



Some of my blogs:

Pregnancy Stories By Age - 43-56+yrs old!
You Can Get Pregnant in Your 40's
Frugal Freebies



~*~ Catherine, mom to three grown men - Jason, Michael & Joshua and Granma to Christopher & Leia.


iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2003
Mon, 02-22-2010 - 4:00pm

~~ it's PLEASE try not to be angry. (I know, that's next to impossible) ~~

Thanks so much. It gets easier each day. I know it's a wasted emotion, it won't bring him back.

~~ how I wish I could give you the answers that you so desperately need right now. ~~

The vet has said now that it was likely a very aggressive form of cancer - a hemorrhagic tumour. That it could come on that suddenly. The week before his surgery, his bloodwork was perfect. Two weeks later, his b/w was a mess. It may be that it would have happened anyway. I still feel the stress of the surgery caused/or sped up the cancer - but I will never know for sure.

~~I would purposely change my routine, so I wouldn't be home during our special times together. ~~

This is hard, because I work from home - so can't change too much. However, I have started taking a 10-15 minute walk around the block 2-3 times a day. It helps...

I am slowly moving some of his things - the child safety bars we had on our bed to stop him jumping off the bed after his surgery, the water bottle I kept for him on my desk, his treats on the kitchen counter. But his toys, bowls, pillows and bed are still out, and I just can't bring myself to put them away.

When we came home without Buddy, my husband left the blanket I had wrapped him in on the back of the couch. I left it there, because that was Buddy's favourite spot to lay. On the weekend my grandson was here, and he moved the blanket, not knowing. It broke my heart to pick up the blanket, and so I brought it into my office and laid it on the pillow on my desk, where Buddy spent most of his day. I think that is going to be the hardest thing to eventually put away.



~*~ Catherine, mom to Jason, Michael & Joshua


Co-CL Breastmilk vs. Formula Debate Board





Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie First Birthday tickers


No matter what decision you make in your life, or your child's life - there will always be someone just waiting to tell you what a stupid idiot you are for doing so...


Do not assume you know what the silent majority is thinking.



Some of my blogs:

Pregnancy Stories By Age - 43-56+yrs old!
You Can Get Pregnant in Your 40's
Frugal Freebies



~*~ Catherine, mom to three grown men - Jason, Michael & Joshua and Granma to Christopher & Leia.