10 years later

Avatar for rhawk4
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2001
10 years later
2
Sat, 04-26-2014 - 8:04pm

This time of year is a stressful time for me. For those of you who were not members here 10 years ago (I was a lot more active on the site then), Itchy was pretty ill now. He had cancer and had surgery in 2002 and then as soon as he was healed enough he began chemo. It was a long and stressful 15 or so months by late April 2004. His cancer had returned and he was slowly losing his battle. In the meantime, Electra had several health issues including kidney failure, mega-colon and had gone deaf. To add to the hard times, CopyCat was ill and had gone missing.

It is hard to believe that May 12th will mark 10 years since we lost Itchy, May 29th will mark Electra’s 10 year and May 27th for CopyCat. I miss them all so much still and forever will.

Of course it is extraordinarily difficult when one of your companions leaves. Hell, I go as far as saying it is incredibly painful, stressful and causes months, nay years of sorrow and sadness. Still, had it not been for the bond and love you felt there could be no pain and sorrow. Many decide it is too hard to go through it again and opt to not. I came to realize the pain was great, but the love and memories were far greater. Knowing I had given a loving home to my friends and companions combined with how happy they made me and how wonderful most of the memories were, made me realize that I could not not share my life, my heart and home again. So I did and still do and hope to always.

Here is the letter I wrote to Itchy 10 days before he left us (it was posted on this site in May 2004 as well as my cats website then and it still means a lot to me today):

 My dear sweet Itchy,

You have touched my life more than you or I could ever imagine. You brought me laughs, you brought me tears, you brought me hope, you brought me pain. Itchy, you brought me life and love.

I am unable to express with words just how deeply you touched my life, there seems to be a point where all logic and reason cease, and you entrenched yourself there, in my soul.

I remember the first time I saw you, small, scared, but full of life. You decided Hamlet was your brother and you both became inseparable from then on. At first you did not trust me, or so I thought. I now know it was just a lesson in patience, with you my teacher. As I learned each lesson you taught me over the years, I never realized what you were doing. I now see that you did teach me and kept me heavily rewarded with things far more valuable than any monitory treasures. You gave me the rewards of your love, respect, trust and friendship, all the most wondrous and richest of gifts I would have ever hoped or wished for.

Your teachings have come to an end and I know you must leave me soon. But how does one say good bye to all you have offered and shown me? You tell me I am ready, I can see it in your face, but I just cannot see it in myself. All I see now is the pain, sorrow and anger welling up, rushing to fill the void you will leave in my soul, the place you lived in my heart. I am and will drown in a sea of tears and sorrow, left with nothing I fear. My heart will hurt without you. My life will never be the same with the loss of you. I lose part of myself. My life will never be what it once was, for I will no longer have you.

With all my heart,

David

Here is to all our loved ones who are at the Rainbow Bridge. I hope they are all playing and waiting for the day they see us again. A BIG hug to all who have felt the pain as well.

Sincerely,

David and the CoolCyberCats

David and the CoolCyberCats


Forever in my heart


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Community Leader
Registered: 04-19-2008
In reply to: rhawk4
Sun, 04-27-2014 - 1:31pm

Oh David, {{{^Itchy^, ^Electra^, and ^CopyCat's^ Dad}}}  how lovely to see you again.   Gosh, I just can't believe it's been 10 years since your beloveds made their journey to the Other Side.  For loving bridgeparents, the pain never really goes away ..... a little scar of love will always be on our hearts. 

"Happy" 10th WingDay to ^Itchy^, ^Electra^, and ^CopyCat^

With my heart,
Lin, Whisper's Mom
www.whisperintheheart.com
www.facebook.com/WhisperInTheHeart

With my heart,
 
Avatar for rhawk4
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2001
In reply to: rhawk4
Mon, 05-12-2014 - 7:45am

Hello Lin,

Thanks for the reply. It is hard to belive 10 years ago this morning Itchy had to leave. No the pain is always there and today I miss him a lot. I am on a trip to the east coast visiting my mother for her 87th birthday and mothersday (same day) and woiuld have liked to be home today to light a candle for Itchy. I'll have to do it Wednesday, but it wont have the same impact to me then. Funny how it feels impossible at the time, but life moves on.

Here is wishing you and your the very best. :)

Sincerely,

David

David and the CoolCyberCats


Forever in my heart


Enter YOUR Cool Cat! A winner each month! 

Cats nap, only humans put them to sleep: Sterilize, don't euthanize.