Sex life sucks.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2010
Sex life sucks.
3
Wed, 12-29-2010 - 1:08am

I've been married for 4 months and have had sexual intercourse twice in my marriage. My husband and I were dating for 4 1/2 years before we got married. We had sex a lot more (han twice) before we got married. It was painful for me, as I was a virgin when he first met but I still want(ed) to feel that closeness and connection with him. He assured me when we were engaged that it will be better once we are married because we will be doing it more often....this is definitely not the case. I find myself asking for it and he always declines saying that he will ejaculate too quickly, (whic his track record has shown). I've asked him very nicely how come we don't have intercourse much, his answer, "I don't know". And when I bring up what he said in the past about us doing it more often he just tells me I have impeccable memory. Just to be clear, my husband would choose the electric chair than communicate to a female about his feelings. I told him that "I don't know" is not a good reason and if he doesn't have an answer he can at leat think about it and tell me he will let me know. That was two weeks ago. Never brought up again. Tonight, I dressed up in lingerie, he fell asleep on the couch. When I asked him if he's coming up stairs, he finally did and collapsed on the bed like a whale. I mentioned that I had lingerie on but I know he's tired. He said, oh, which brings me here at 1:10am.

Avatar for cmpat
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-21-2003
Thu, 12-30-2010 - 10:56am

Dear nyny11, I'm so sorry that you're going through this and I encourage you to take a look at the the following message boards on our Love and Sex channel, I'm suggesting a few that may be on-topic with where you're at in life right now:

Photobucket
Avatar for xxxs
Community Leader
Registered: 01-25-2010
Sun, 03-06-2011 - 5:31pm

What he has is premature ejaculation.

dragowoman

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-06-2012
Sat, 10-06-2012 - 6:17pm
I recently read a book called The Damn Man by DeAngelo Demus, all of the stories are real based on infidelity in the work place, I swear some of the stories reminded me of my own relationship. I found myself getting angry after reading one of the stories about a husband that was addicted to porn, no wonder the husband didn't have an appetite to have sex with his wife any longer, he was too busy watching porn and having phone sex. Ladies should read this book, it'll piss you off but it's really good.