Should I always be left out? I think it is unfair

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2013
Should I always be left out? I think it is unfair
12
Fri, 01-10-2014 - 4:37pm

 

Sometiems I feel Im not part of the company I work for, like Im not a coworker to the rest of them.

 

For the position I have most of the times I never get invited to lunches to celebrate some coworkers birthdays cause someone needs to stay and pick up the phone and take messages, the desk cant remain alone so I always has to stay and everyone most of the office can go and celebrate during lunch time and when they go out to lunch they take like 2 hrs lunch time (when they all go out with the general manager), but when I am at lunch at work any ordinary day my time is 1 hr. and even when I want to go out to lunch outside I can only have 1 hr due to my job position.

 

My position is administrative assistant/front desk assistant. So thru me all the clients and visitors stop by first before going inside the company. Because of this job I am not allowed to leave my desk  and leave the desk unattended for quite some time.

 

For this reason is why some times Im not even consider to attend meetings at the office when all the company is call to attend a staff meeting, cause there is noone who cant cover my place for a few minutes.

 

The only time my place is covered is when Im at lunch time during the week and while Im on vacations as that is planned ahead of time who covers me but when many coworkers are taking another coworker for her or his bday celebration outside the office Im not invited, not even consider to go with them as they know I cant leave my desk if there is noone to fill me in.

  

I find that unfair. I mean. Am I not a coworker too?   Just cause my position is where I am, they simply know my desk cannot be unattended If I leave and there is no one to fill me in so they already know that and simply they never invite me for anything.  

 

Because when it comes to celebrate someone bday with a lunch no one at work can sacrifice themselves and cover for me for once or twice so I can join them  and be part of the celebration, , as they all want to go, no one wants to stay at the office  When there is a bday celebration with cake and appetizers inside the company or a special gathering at work where food is served, and it  takes place in one of the meeting rooms. Im not called either, what they do is to bring me the piece of cake and beverage to my desk, as I have to stay at the desk, just like 3 times I had joined all of them, otherwise they always bring me the piece of cake or any appetizer and beverage to my desk.

 

My immediate supervisor is the own general manager and she was the one who made that policy that my desk cannot be unattended as visitors or clients may stop by if my desk is empty. but she does not even help or be flexible with me like for instance to tell other coworkers to skip a particular lunch so I can go to like the rest of the coworkers she never does it.

 

The Genera Manger treats much better the office maid and she is more flexible with her than myself and she is her boss too.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2013
Wed, 07-02-2014 - 1:03pm
In my opinion, it IS unfair that you are left out of everything in your office. If they have someone who covers your lunch on a daily basis, why can't that person stay back once in a while to allow you to attend these lunches and meetings? I worked as a receptionist several years ago and could have run into the same problem. However, my bosses made a point of fairly dividing who attended such events. On another note, I am very surprised that anyone asks for advice on iVillage anymore. There are so many women who are just downright rude, hateful and mean on here. I'm not going to name any names because I am certain that they (and everyone else) know who they are. There are ways to say things to get your point across in a respectful way and there are ways to be a witch. Some people constantly choose the latter. I have stopped coming here for advice because I know that this person/people are always going to have some hateful comment. Women are supposed to support each other! I'm not saying that anyone should blow sunshine up another's butt but the hateful comments need to stop. Kindness gets you a lot further than rudeness. It gets your point across better, as well.
Avatar for lizmvr
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2001
Fri, 02-21-2014 - 11:13am

Thanks for chiming in, Catherine!

I think your tips highlight the fact that the original poster really does have power over her own situation, and realizing where that power lies will hopefully help her deal with the frustration she's been feeling.

Liz


Clinical Research Associate


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http://www.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2014
Fri, 02-21-2014 - 2:38am

You can try this 2 options.
1st, If you are not happy with you work, you can resigned and find a work of your choice. Choose the field of work that you desired.
2nd option is just ignore it, instead just work hard, consider it as a challenge and prove to them that their are wrong. Best of luck.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2002
Fri, 01-17-2014 - 1:41pm

Are you *still* complaining about this?  You've been posting this same, tired story for years on iVillage (under various ids).  Why haven't you found another job as yet?  You can't change the company, you can only change YOU. 

Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

.  -Albert Einstein

Avatar for lizmvr
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2001
Tue, 01-14-2014 - 12:42pm

"So for you Im not part of this company and Im not a coworker cause that is not my job to participate in in house social events done by the company? Well employees also have to socialize at work othewise what a boring job all workplaces are."

Workplaces aren't for socializing. I agree with the other posters. It might be boring, but if it's that untolerable for you, you need to find a different job. I personally think your company sounds fairly kind. It's nice that they have lunches and parties at all, and it sounds like they go out of their way to make sure you get a piece of cake, too. There are far worse places to work, but if you think that you are somehow entitled to better treatment, quit and let someone who truly wants to work take your place. You do have a choice in where you work and to which jobs you apply.

Liz


Clinical Research Associate


-------------------------------------------------
http://www.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2013
Mon, 01-13-2014 - 5:56pm

I know but i feel im part of this company too entitled  to be treated equal for certain things like this one. Im not saying for everything and besides I feel the maid of the company is more important than me as she is treated much better than me for certain things. She gets away with it because she sucks up to the General Manager and that is why.Of course Im not a petulant to say directly to the manager I think it is unfair. of course imnot that arrogant. I just came to that conclusion cause is not the first time they do that to me in the 8 yrs on the job I have here and Im not saying it has to happen very often but once in a while

For instance today at work once again I was left out for a birthday celebration tht took place in a meeting room fo the company and not only that but it was also  the employee of the month voting and I was not even in the meeting room participating cause I had to be outside guarding the front desk. Both events were done at the same time. 

When the employee of the month voting takes place, and I have someone who can cover me, Im called to attend. and taht usually never happens so I never atttend the voting. When there is someone to cover me it is usually the maid daughter who while she is from school holidays she come to the office to work, that is the only moment I cant attend, if the maid daughter cover me otherwise Im never called.

The  daughter has been coming to work to the office for some weeks now but she does not vote as she is not on the company payroll she is just paid for professional services as she still in high school and she is not a company employee.

So today for those 2 events I was not invited and both of themm took place at the office. You know why I was not invited?

1. The Gneral manager was not at the office as she will be coming later on, but she told the maid earlier in the day she can throw the small celebration without her but she be present by the time the voting was going to take place.

2. The maid planned the celebration but not intend to tell me to join them cause the General Manager did not  tell her if I could  be present for the bday and the voting thing, that was cause there iwas noone to cover me at the front desk.

3. Cause the bday event was to sing happy bday and eat cake to the maid (she and another coworker were the honorees) and her daughter had to be present at the celebration therefore the daughter could not guard me  so therefore there was noone who can be here at my desk to cover me for like 20 minutes, cause the daughter had to be present.

4. When the General Manager came for the voting thing, she just told me: "X As the maid daughter had to be present in the celebration she cant come and cover you".  SO tell me  if u want some piece of cake and beverage and I bring it to you.

5. So cause noone could copver me for a few minutes I could  not even be present for the voting either.

Im not saying I have to have benefits in this company but I do believe Im a coworker like the rest of the employees, I share lunch times with them at kunch time in the kitchen, but they treat me sometimes like im not part of it, just for the mere fact that my desk need to be guarded the whole time, even if the phone never rings and there are no visitors that stop by (of course that I cant know in advance). But like I said someone at work can cover for  me for a few minutes and  exchange times, how hard that can be?  No, they wont do it as they all want to be present the whole time, and enjoy, but I cant enjoy like them.

Even for going to the barthroom it takes me a lot of struggle to find someone who can cover for me just for a few tiny minutes so I can go to pee. That is why sometimes I dont ask anyone to cover while Im on the bathroom cause while I look for someone  to come to my desk to cover me and I really have to go to the bathroom I for sure had pissed already  in my pants hehe!!

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2013
Mon, 01-13-2014 - 5:03pm

So for you Im not part of this company and Im not a coworker cause that is not my job to participate in in house social events  done by the company?   Well employees also have to socialize at work  othewise what a boring job all workplaces are.

That sounds kind of grinch from u

Avatar for elc11
Community Leader
Registered: 06-16-1998
Sat, 01-11-2014 - 10:24pm

I don't see it as unfair, it is just the nature of your position at the company. If your job description says that you are to be at the front desk from 9-5 with a break from 12-1, that is what you agreed to do when you took the job. If you can demonstrate to your boss that it would benefit the company to have you attend the staff meetings then she might get somebody to cover for you. But if there is no discernable benefit for you to be in the staff meeting then your boss probably will not consider it a good allocation of resources to put another employee into your job, especially if the other employee is paid more or more involved in however the company makes money. For the birthday lunches, you could ask your boss to let you go occasionally if the honoree is a special friend of yours. Whatever you do, don't tell her that its unfair---that sounds petulant and entitled. There are so many people who would be happy to have any kind of job that your boss knows that she doesn't need to tolerate a disgruntled employee.

I have worked in small offices that closed entirely for the lunch period, you might be happier in a situation like that. Although, when the staff all went out for a birthday lunch the receptionist often had to return to the office before everybody else so the doors and phones would be open on time. 

Avatar for sabrtooth
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-1999
Fri, 01-10-2014 - 8:53pm

I am quite sure you were not hired to attend parties, or enhance your social life.  You were hired to handle the front desk, unless the absense is scheduled and cover is specifically arranged.  If this means you cannot attend parties, then so be it.  Many people begin their careers working difficult, unpleasant jobs.  Handling the job with enthusiasum, professionalism, and without complaint, will help you when you seek promotion.  Should you decide to quit because you are not included in parties, be aware that OTHER employers will NOT see this as a viable reason.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-08-2006
Fri, 01-10-2014 - 6:57pm
It is unfair, but it. Might not be directed at you personally. Iwould start with the in house events. The next time one iss he dulled, I think youshouldpolitely. Ask your manager if thereare two people you could ask to cover your desk for Fifteen minutes each...that way,you could all attend for partof the time. Afterwards, thank her and ask if for future in house events, you can ask them without checking with her. For the outside lunches, if the. Person begin celebrated is someone you are close to,see ifyou can identify someone not so lose to themans again, go to your manager...explain that since youare the 'first face' foryourcompany, you want to know your coworkers better and that will benefit the company. You might not be able to go to every event,but maybe as people become aware that you like to participate, they will either move more events in house, or volunteer to stay behind so you can go. Or youmightfind out these events aren't as fun as you think, and you will be glad to stay behind:). Don't assume others know that you feel left out....many people don't empathize well with others. And if your manager says'no ' then you can decide if this isabig enough issue to make you look for a new job.

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