Should I always be left out? I think it is unfair

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2013
Should I always be left out? I think it is unfair
Fri, 01-10-2014 - 4:37pm


Sometiems I feel Im not part of the company I work for, like Im not a coworker to the rest of them.


For the position I have most of the times I never get invited to lunches to celebrate some coworkers birthdays cause someone needs to stay and pick up the phone and take messages, the desk cant remain alone so I always has to stay and everyone most of the office can go and celebrate during lunch time and when they go out to lunch they take like 2 hrs lunch time (when they all go out with the general manager), but when I am at lunch at work any ordinary day my time is 1 hr. and even when I want to go out to lunch outside I can only have 1 hr due to my job position.


My position is administrative assistant/front desk assistant. So thru me all the clients and visitors stop by first before going inside the company. Because of this job I am not allowed to leave my desk  and leave the desk unattended for quite some time.


For this reason is why some times Im not even consider to attend meetings at the office when all the company is call to attend a staff meeting, cause there is noone who cant cover my place for a few minutes.


The only time my place is covered is when Im at lunch time during the week and while Im on vacations as that is planned ahead of time who covers me but when many coworkers are taking another coworker for her or his bday celebration outside the office Im not invited, not even consider to go with them as they know I cant leave my desk if there is noone to fill me in.


I find that unfair. I mean. Am I not a coworker too?   Just cause my position is where I am, they simply know my desk cannot be unattended If I leave and there is no one to fill me in so they already know that and simply they never invite me for anything.  


Because when it comes to celebrate someone bday with a lunch no one at work can sacrifice themselves and cover for me for once or twice so I can join them  and be part of the celebration, , as they all want to go, no one wants to stay at the office  When there is a bday celebration with cake and appetizers inside the company or a special gathering at work where food is served, and it  takes place in one of the meeting rooms. Im not called either, what they do is to bring me the piece of cake and beverage to my desk, as I have to stay at the desk, just like 3 times I had joined all of them, otherwise they always bring me the piece of cake or any appetizer and beverage to my desk.


My immediate supervisor is the own general manager and she was the one who made that policy that my desk cannot be unattended as visitors or clients may stop by if my desk is empty. but she does not even help or be flexible with me like for instance to tell other coworkers to skip a particular lunch so I can go to like the rest of the coworkers she never does it.


The Genera Manger treats much better the office maid and she is more flexible with her than myself and she is her boss too.


Avatar for lizmvr
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2001
Fri, 02-21-2014 - 11:13am

Thanks for chiming in, Catherine!

I think your tips highlight the fact that the original poster really does have power over her own situation, and realizing where that power lies will hopefully help her deal with the frustration she's been feeling.


Clinical Research Associate


iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2013
Wed, 07-02-2014 - 1:03pm
In my opinion, it IS unfair that you are left out of everything in your office. If they have someone who covers your lunch on a daily basis, why can't that person stay back once in a while to allow you to attend these lunches and meetings? I worked as a receptionist several years ago and could have run into the same problem. However, my bosses made a point of fairly dividing who attended such events. On another note, I am very surprised that anyone asks for advice on iVillage anymore. There are so many women who are just downright rude, hateful and mean on here. I'm not going to name any names because I am certain that they (and everyone else) know who they are. There are ways to say things to get your point across in a respectful way and there are ways to be a witch. Some people constantly choose the latter. I have stopped coming here for advice because I know that this person/people are always going to have some hateful comment. Women are supposed to support each other! I'm not saying that anyone should blow sunshine up another's butt but the hateful comments need to stop. Kindness gets you a lot further than rudeness. It gets your point across better, as well.