Will you think this is degrading?
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|Thu, 04-10-2014 - 5:49pm|
Do not bash me (like you always do) I just want to know other people opinion as what do you think about this situation and how is your opinion about it and if you feel that the person ordering these things is acting correctly or she is trespassing the line to get involved in the personal life of a person and the coworker has to obey. I know this cause this is happening at the workplace with a coworker.
I have a female coworker who is married, has 2 kids one in common with her husband and the oldest one has another father but he lives with her, her youngest son is in elementary age and the oldest one is 18 yrs old and he works at the company.
This coworker is not wealthy and neither is her husband, not that they had reach the poverty level of course not. She is very religious. They have their house, they do not have a car though, but the husband has a motorcycle and he drops her off everyday at work in the morning and after work either he picks her up or she uses public transportation. They both struggle everyday to make a living by working in their respective workplaces or at least to provide the needs for their family.
This coworker never had dressed like a homeless person to say it in a way, like with ragged clothes or something like that. She dressed normal, average but not with expensive clothes cause she cant afford to buy very nice clothes, cause she has other priorities at her house rather than to buy fancy or nice clothes to come to work. But it is not like her clothes are terrible, they are very simple clothes. For her position at work sometimes she receives visits so for image, she has to dress accordingly but she does it in a simple manner cause she is a simple lady. This lady hair has always been curly and she has told me her husband like her curls.
Well last year she told me something that I was not sure how to think of it or make of it.
This lady immediate supervisor or boss is the general manager, she is a lady and as far as I know at work and it not only me who says that but other coworkers, this manager likes to intrude in the personal life of the coworkers and make an opinion about it. It is the truth but this manager is very nosy.
This coworker from a time on, she now has her hair straightened and I thought oh maybe she wanted to change a little her appearance and feel good. Then I later found out that for her own choice she did not straighten her hair, cause she loves her curly hair and her husband also loves her curly hair that , she has told me, if she did the change was to please the manager, cause the manager once told her she should change her style so she can look more presentable and appealing and less old and curly hair was not the way to go, but since this coworker could not afford to go to the saloon to pay for that treatment cause the treatment was not cheap (keratine treatment for lasting straightening) the manager paid the treatment herself and now she has no curls anymore but she has to keep going to the saloon every now and then for maintenance otherwise the curls may come back but the maintenance she has to pay it herself though. She told me once that she is not so fond of going to the saloon every now and then cause it is expensive for her to pay for it each time she goes and also cause she likes better the curly hair but in order for the mangaer to look at her always presentable, if the lady cant afford it, she had asked the company for a loan and then the company will lower her salary a particular amount each pay day to make up for the loan she asked for it. That is the hair part now lets move to the clothes part.
Last week, one day I see this lady with clothes I have never seen before so I though ohh nice then she told me that she did not buy the clothes on her own cause at this moment the money she has she invests it in other things(house expenses, utilities, the kids, the school, etc) and if she has to buy new clothes it will be little by little and when she wants and not now. Then she added: The manager deposited me $200 so I can buy new clothes.
I don’t know but when I heard that I was like what??? How this manager can do that, for me it sounds a bit humiliating cause the manager believes or thinks this lady is homeless and she has sympathy for her and poor her. Like I said this coworker is not rich but she dresses in a simple conservative manner, she does not dress like a homeless or with crazy stuff either. The manager of course can afford to buy clothes more often and of good brands and she looks more presentable due to her position but also she earns more money than her and some of the clothes she owns her husband has bought them.
For me it is humiliating and intruding in a person’s private life cause to tell a person you have to do this to your hair cause you do not look presentable and you look old, with those words, that is wrong! That is not the manager choice what I do with my hair or not or the clothes I buy or not is my choice is not hers to choose and to butt in. At work the manager had only done this to this particular coworker to make her change the hairstyle and to tell to buy new clothes and shoes because you do not look good according to her.
Have you heard of similar situations in other companies?