How do I adjust my attitude?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2008
How do I adjust my attitude?
Sat, 08-17-2013 - 3:01pm

I recently opted to work in a certain new section at work. Another colleague, who I am very fond of and never worked with directly before, has been brought in as the next senior person (to the boss) on the team. She has a reputation for not doing things herself and being good at delegating.

Things are going fine in the 10 days that the new team has been in place but I am now deeply suspicious of my colleague. On two occasions, I felt she was palming off some work on to me and not taking on any herself, at least the drudgery portion of it. She keeps saying she has to help with other things but doesn't seem to be taking on the actual dirty work. She is very conciliatory and apologetic when she asks me to do this but I am wondering if that is genuine or just a tactic. 

I do know all of us have to chip in when there are fewer hands available but it hurts my ego that I'm called on for the drudgery. I don't know if years of feeling/being exploited have contributed to this. I do not want to be obsessing about this nor do I want to spoil a collegial friendship. I dislike my job but am hanging on because I don't know how to get a new one and options in my city are limited. I want to take it easy, not think so much about it.

I keep trying to tell myself let me just do the job for the money but my ego and self-esteem keep raising their heads. I used to have a good profile at work earlier but got relegated to the current role because of need, now have neither confidence nor interest, and then made this decision to move to this team which is turning out confusing.

How do I make the best of this situation? I hate confrontation and I feel petty even thinking like this about my colleague.


iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Sun, 08-18-2013 - 12:07pm

I guess if this woman's position is superior to yours, then she does have the right to delegate the drudge work to you--being the boss, really why would she keep the worst work for herself?  Her own boss is going to be looking to her to see if certain work gets done.  I think the best way to get ahead is for you to get this boring work done in a timely manner, make sure it's all done correctly and then ask her if you can help out on more interesting things.  You've only been working together for 10 days so I think you need to give it more time to see how things pan out.