About to lose it, need calming words
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About to lose it, need calming words
| Thu, 08-12-2004 - 4:52pm |
I am so freaked out I am about to throw up, I swear. As if everything else weren't enough that my H has doled out, I checked our mail today and found a big huge packet from child support enforcement in another state. Appears he has a daughter born about three months before we met 9 years ago. They want $310 a month plus over $4,000 in back support. The extent of knowlege I had of this was an offhand remark during a conversation after we were married saying that a girl he used to date years and years ago got pregnant but that it probably wasn't his. The paperwork that came in the mail said she told him it was his when she was pregnant, that he agreed, that he sent letters asking about the pregnancy and the child. This kid was born three months before we met.
God, I don't know what to do about this. It's my opinion that men who knowingly duck paying child support are lower than low.
I want to scream but I am at work. (seems to be a trend.)
MG

MG -
I'm really sorry I didn't see this until now, I had to leave work early today.
What to do about this, you ask?
CL-Blueliner4
If they were truthful from the start we'd never stay with them! So they make up their own little world and invite the new victim in, and we go because we just don't know!
Just to protect yourself, if that mail was addressed to him and you opened it without his approval, he can get you in trouble. Please, you know he's an abuser, don't give him any more reason to be able to find revenge in what you used to be able to take for granted. Abusers will fight back when confronted and no matter how mad this makes you, please for your own protection, don't give him the room to blow this up in your face.
Try to compose yourself and use this anger to do something positive for yourself, get out.
But while getting free, don't scuttle your own plans by doing anything rash. Just because he is what he is, don't allow this to bring you down to his level, he'd like that too much. Find the resources you need to get free, do it with intelligence, you will be alot happier when you do. Refocus the energy into a plan for freedom for you.
Hugs
The ball's in your court.