am i overreacting
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am i overreacting
| Wed, 03-31-2004 - 4:42pm |
I feel I have reached the end of my rope. I have no one to talk to because he has isolated me from all my old friends and the only people I can get to when he is not around is his family. He has never hit me or the kids. But he does have to control everything I do. I am not allowed to work. I am not allowed to go back to school. I am not allowed to go to my parents with out him. If some one calls on the phone I am not allowed to go anywhere away from him, he wants to be where he hears every word. It is normally one of my cousins. When it is time to go to bed I have to go with him even if I was already doing something, if I don't follow him he gets upset and yells. My grandmother died at the begining of this year, She was a 2 day drive away from me at the time visiting family. I wasn't allowed to go because he couldn't afford to take off work. My parents and Uncle went, I wanted to ride with them I don't work, the kids are in school, and his family said they would help take care of the kids. He wouldn't allow me to go because he said he felt that we both should be there because he was just as close to her. We have been married for 12 years and together for 14 years. I used to write peotry when I was younger to deal with my feeling but I quit that because if he found something I wrote he would question me on every detail and tell me I was over reacting to how I was percieving things. If he finds a phone number to anyone male or female I get the third degree. He will check the phone to bill to make sure I'm telling the truth about not knowing who it belongs to. He came home one day and saw tire tracks in the driveway that he didn't know and accused me of having someone there. When I told him the only person that came by today was the electric man to read the meter he didn't believe me and told me those weren't his tracks and chased him down to make sure. They just happened to change trucks because his had broke down. He never appoligized. I must tell him what I do with amlost every penny I spend If I'm off by a few dollars its lecture time. He keeps a check on the mileage on my car, and if i go to the store with out telling him its lecture time again. If he calls and I'm on the phone he wants to know why and who to. I'm not supposed to have anyone over and he gets mad if anyone does come over. That includes my family and I can't sneak around behind his back to see them because his mom live right up the road and his brother lives across the street so he knows when I leave, how long I'm gone and if someone stops by. I have told him I feel smoothered and that he is to controlling. But he tells me I'm overreacting, or that I have a boyfriend and am just loooking for and accuse to get out of the marriage. It just can't be his fault, it either has to be me or another man. And just for the record no there is no one else. I know this letter is just all over the place and I'm sorry about that I'm just trying to get it out before I chicken out or he shows up. Also to let you know how our life together works I get up in the mornings fix his lunch and cofee and bring him a cup of coffe and his clothes. I do all of the cooking and cleaning when he is at work. When he gets home from work I take off his shoes bring him a glass of tea and listen to him vent about his day. I fix him every glass he drinks, I bring him his plate and anything he needs with it and I take it back to the kitchen when he is done. I also run his bath water and bring him his towel and clothes. While he is in the bath I wash his hair and back. If I say no to sex he gets upset I fiannally forced a rule of at least 24 hours in betwwen but he normally still gets his way because I don't want to have to listen to his lectures. But I'm starting to feel if i don't get out now I never will and starting to get depressed beyound what I can mentally handle on my own. I just need I for some one to tell me I'm not overreacting. I know I don't have it as bad as other because He doesn't hit on me or the kids.

Hi honey, and welcome -
YOU ARE NOT OVER-REACTING.
I said it.
CL-Blueliner4