And now... guilt
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| Wed, 08-25-2004 - 1:33pm |
So, the latest thing is he is freaked out and thinks he might have breast cancer. I guess he found some lumps on his chest. It could be true. He smokes about a pack of unfiltered cigarettes a day and cancer runs in his family.
Anyway, he calls me about a week ago and says, "When is a good time for me to go to the doctor." Now, we are down to one vehicle, because he hasn't renewed the registration on his truck and I have refused to do it for him. It was the week before school started for our 2 kids. I said that my schedule was really packed, but that Saturday morning would work OK. So he called back and said he couldn't get in Sat. morning. I said I wasn't sure when would work the following week, I was checking my schedule book, he got pissed and hung up on me.
Fast forward to a few minutes ago. He called again and asked about when would work well. I again said there is lots of stuff going on, but lets check my book. Before I even had it open he started saying how awful I am because I only care about how much this is going inconvenience me. And he hung up again, saying something to the effect of "Fine, we'll just see how long it takes" (... to die was implied.) I called back. Told him that ordinarily I would not bite when he tries to bait and manipulate me like that, but that because it was a health issue I was making an exception. He kept interrupting me. I told him Friday would work best, because I have back to school meetings for each of the kids' classes, special education testing for my 4yo DD, work, and swimming lessons the rest of the week. He promptly said, "Come home now, I am leaving," and slammed down the phone.
What the ....?
MG

You go through too much to cater to his needs. Do you have public transportation in your city/town? If he doesn't want to keep his truck legal, let him ride the bus. MY ex husband who will not leave so I'm moving out plays doctor cards on me all the time. Once he had a skin tag removed and he acted like his leg had been amputated. I've had that done and it never hurt me, he just wanted sympathy. I can tell you what.....if I ever find a man who is NOT abusive I doubt I will trust him....I don't think I can ever trust another man. Isn't that awful, but I can't help it.
You sound like you have your ducks in a row. I wish I could be strong, on occasion I am, until I see him diving at me with his foot out hitting me in the face, neck, anywhere. He literally dives at me. I've never fought back, well maybe twice, but I got it worse when I did. I'm scared being bipolar I may do something to end my pain by hurting him the next time he hits me, which will be sometime today after 6. It has been this way for so long, I almost could schedule the beatings. He thinks he is so handsome (he use to be), says he's the best looking 40 anywhere, that people at work love him. Oh....please let one of them take him. =o)
Carla
Ignore him.
Anyway, I'm glad I didn't fall for it......because months later and a new job and girlfriend, he's still very much alive. Gee, I wonder what ever happened to that "life-threatening" disease he said he had??
What H U G E piles of crap they try to feed us.
In real life, I'm not usually a mouthy one unless I'm tired or really, REALLY pissed off.
He did make an appointment after hanging up on me the second time. I hope his hypochondriac behavior is again the case this time. I don't know what I would do if he was really sick. I don't want to stay with him. But, God, what kind of a heartless person would I be if I divorced him, leaving him with no insurance, right in the middle of a battle with cancer? Oh, that would just suck beyond belief. Suppose it sounds selfish, as he is my kids' father, but I don't want to take care of him and I don't want to deal with the financial ruin a lengthy illness would force upon me.
UGH! This would just be the icing on the cake. Filth, flarn.
May be true, may be another tactic to up the ante. If you do leave him, there's always COBRA, where a person losing insurance can maintain it (for a fee) for up to eighteen months, I think.
You're thinking practically--that's good. The timing is suspect, MG--you know that.
CC
MG
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