CAHL called
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| Sat, 02-18-2006 - 12:02pm |
I had posted recently that x thing had harrassed one of the lady's at my work about helping me find a place to stay in the beginning when I first got out. Well CAHL called me at work. I felt it coming like a change in the barometer before the rains come. The phone rang twice but stopped before I picked it up. I immediately picked up a pen and stared at it for a moment. Sure enough, it rang again and I copied the number down on the display before picking it up. There was CAHL's sickening, pathetic voice. It is important to note that I have not spoke directly to him since the first week of December 2004. In court I always let my lawyer speak while I sat quietly. Perhaps I should have hung up the phone as soon as I heard him, but I surprised myself when instead I laid into him like a charging bull. Even so, I kept my head about me.
It's first approach was clear....to try and shake me up. CAHL started making all sorts of accusations, all false. I kind of took the 'you pathetic loony' approach and made it clear that CAHL was not fooling anyone. I gave evidence of this by pointing out some truths that I suppose he thought I didn't know about. I may just be imagining, but I think I shook him up a bit. No matter, but the important thing was that I never even once felt hurt or like crying, which was a complete change from the old me. I guess I just felt angry and fed up. That alone would be enough to shake him up, because CAHL is used to being able to buffalo me into corners so easily in the past. Once I made it clear that I wasn't playing games with him anymore, I told him to call my lawyer if he wanted to discuss any further. He started to yapp about how 'well, it's your fault too and you didn't have to manipulate everyone into believing your story and I would have divorced you anyway, you didn't have to do it this way and ....blah blah blah'......I hung up the phone when I saw how pointless it was to continue this.
First off, I want to share how amused I am at being accused of manipulating everyone. Everyone would be 4 mental health professionals, 2 lawyers (his included), a judge, an entire security department, a whole set of high level managers, everyone at his previous place of work, the neighbors, and all of his so called friends. Most of these people didn't know me on a personal level and the majority of them had their own experiences with him to base their opinions on. But somehow I used my super mindbending powers to brain wash them. Ok, whatever. Second, CAHL telling me that he would have divorced me anyway and why did I have to go and do it the way I did is just an out right ridiculous statement. The way I did it was to make sure he didn't leave me in complete ruin like he preferred. CAHL's original plan was to win permanent alimony (despite he made the exact same money per month as me), half my pension, leave me with all debt, take all the assets, and then somehow win a nice lump of cash from me for his troubles, regardless of the fact that I had absolutely no money (zippo, only a single paycheck in my account at the beginning, and then he stole half of that as well). That would be ok though, because he was willing to accept monthly payments for the rest of my life. Life would have been pretty good had I not screwed it up by filing for divorce myself. In the final divorce I got nothing from him. Only the few pieces of pressboard 10 year old furniture in the house and a stained, torn mattress. Well, what I did actually get was a restraining order and sole custody of my son with only supervised visitations that never occur anyway. And of course, freedom.
Now, what that phone call did for me though was to show me that I could stand up for myself and not put up with the *&&^ anymore, all all without crying or feeling hurt. I feel a bit stronger for that. Perhaps it was a bit like closure. Anyway, I will not be talking to him again. If he calls, I will receit the number of my lawyer and just hang up.

Well, now!