cant think/see straight LONG please read

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-03-2004
cant think/see straight LONG please read
1
Wed, 05-31-2006 - 9:51pm
i dont even know what to do right now....ive been gone two weeks on vacation to greece after things were pretty damn bad, with one of last things my hubby said to me being "i hope u f****** die on your plane ride to greece"...anyways at the airport he was good and hugged and kissed me goodbye....so im gone 2 weeks and got back last night which was good except he tells me he wants to have sex with me ASAP, even tho ive been up 48 hours and went back in time basically going from greece to canada(9 hours difference....so whatever i thought wow hes being nice we had two good convos while i was away...so we did(TMI i know) anyways, i finally get to sleep about 1 am and have a good sleep then wake up cuz my mom called me so as im talking to her hes all over me touching me which i hate so i pushed him away...he left me alone but then i get off the phone and he wants u know what..again...so whatever i did it(was in the mood FOR ONCE) and then tried to sleep a little more but he keeps poking at me and touching me so i push him away and then he starts yelling how i never give him what he wants and rolls over so i touch his arm and say please dont fight with me im tired and ive had a long two days but he shobves me away so hard i almost fall off the bed...soi just leave him alone..anyways then we get up and heacts like he never got upset...so we have a good time and decide to go out for a bit....he pulls over on the side of the road after getting his cell bill to call and ask bout something on the bill(after he gets mad at ME because HE sent 24 text messages and he doesnt have the included in his plan) and its one of those voice prompt menus and he keeps talking between questions and i tell him "it picks up everything u say u cant talk while ur on the phone when its asking u stuff" and he flips out at me and tells me he wishes i never came back and so i say whateve rim leaving ill walk home and as im getting out of the car he says "oh yeh and ur f****** fat too!" so i start crying and walk away then realized im going the opposite way of home so turn around and go back and he whistles out his car window "hey sexy get in the car" at me and i just stared at him then gave him the finger and then he strats howling and whistling trying to be funny and there r ppl around so i got in the car and he just drives off like nothing happened and goes home...so i dont say anything and then we decide to take my dog and my moms for a walk and while were walking he has my moms dog and wont let her off a tight leash and i tell him dont hold her so tight and he says no i dont want her on ppls lawns and i said yeh but let her sniff along the edge so he does and then he starts lettin gher walk in the street(luckily a very quiet side street) but i tell him to bring her on the sidewalk and he starts yelling at me that i can take her then cuz hes trying to train her to walk right on a leash and i said well whatever ill take her then ive been gone two weeks and want them to enjoy their walk, not like his dog who was so regimented it never left his side on a walk...then he says fine u choose them over me im leaving and walks back to our house...so i finish the walk and come in and he starts going on about how i dont train them and i dont know how to do anything right and then gets up and goes to the ktichen so i sit on the couch and he comes in and tells me i dont do anything for him, never appreciate what he does, etc etc....and i tell him yes i do but i dont like how u treat me sometimes when im not doing anything wrong...then he tells me i dont do anything eight in bed, i dontwalk aroun din sexy lingerie all the time etc etc and i tell him as i have before thats not who i am i dont walk aroun din the daytim ein my underwear..why would i? then he tells me ill never be good enough for him and he realizes it now and tells me hes going to go get drunk and takes off(btw, he has been off booze and drugs and smokes for two weeks and going to therapy and AA as he "realized he has a problem")....so i just dont know what to do...i cant see what im doing wrong, if anything...i guess i need some unbiased opinions of if this is totally him which im thinking, or if im stupid and cant see what i do wrong(as he says)...sorry this is so long but im so confused and only been home less than 24 hours!
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-05-2004
Thu, 06-01-2006 - 11:31am

Yep, this is him. This is not acceptable behavior, which I think you already know. Using sex as a weapon is never acceptable.

Your best bet is to check with your local DV shelter (should be in the Yellow Pages of your phone book) and discuss your options. Also check out our board website, accessible at the top of our Start page.

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