divorce court
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| Mon, 02-14-2005 - 11:44pm |
I am coming up on my divorce court next week and would like to know what happens there. Is it just this one date, and everything is finished? Or does it go on and on before you get the papers. I am in a bit of a hurry because I read in my employee handbook that they only permit pension distribution to divorced spouses in marriages over 10 years. I will only be 10 years on October 5 this year. So if this divorce is over by then, I don't even have to argue with it, though my lawyer seems to think there is no chance of him getting it anyhow. He has yelled at me in court though that he will take half my pension......of course that in addition to spousal support. Meanwhile, he figures he won't have to pay child support because I am such an undeserving &%$^&. He has planned a pretty good deal for himself you think?
By the way, has anyone ever heard of a case where the abusive spouse gets spousal support. Please tell me this can't happen.........I mean, I have ALL the debt (the house, car etc), full child custody and responsibility, and he earned just as much as I did up until only just this november. Now he claims he can't work because I ruined his life and career because I could not find him a job he liked (this is quite literally his argument, no sarcasm). Please tell me he can't do this to me........

It depends on what happens with continuances, etc..
CL-Blueliner4
Oh, I am not down under, but rather up above. I live in Austria. It makes it that much more difficult because of the language problems. They keep telling me that they are trying to make a point to follow US law, specifically Nevada, in order that the divorce will be recognized there. So I figure any advice about divorce proceedings here will for the most part apply. I figure the alimony argument will not be upheld because of him being a healthy, theoretically capable biologically man, at least I hope.... But I would really feel better if this all was complete by October so that my pension would never be an issue. This whole thing was started in November, and finally going to court over it on Feb 22. We spent January and first part of February going to court over the restraining order. He said it was all lies of course....
About me not finding him a job....oh yes. That is what he said many times. He figured it was my responsibility to get one for him because I brought him here. Here is how he describes it: I maliciously applied for this job and was offered it. When I told him about it, I commanded that he quit his current blossoming career so that I can be better than him. I brought him here kicking and screaming, until he resorted to pleading and begging me to return back so that he could have his career back. I demanded that he stay and work as a stay at home father and clean the house, take care of the child, and do as he is told. Then I maliciously demanded for a divorce because he was annoying me with his pathetic crying and pleading.
This is my version of the story: I applied for the job when I was out of work and was offered it 2 years later, after having already found a good paying job. Before that he was punching holes in walls during fights about how I wasn't trying hard enough to find a good job. When I got the offer, I said I would pass it up because I didn't want to cause the tension that I knew would enevitably result from him going to a place where work would be difficult to find for him (we had already had 2 years of too much tension). He insisted. Oh, before my getting the offer, he walked in approximately 2 days after I returned from the hospital from giving birth and said 'I quit my job, I hope you don't freak out on me'. I was ok with it thinking he had been getting violent from being so angry about work and thought things would be more peaceful then. By the way, the blossoming career was a minimum wage security guard job at a casino. We came, he freaked out after about 2 weeks, and I immediately got my son into day care to avoid the spouse feeling like a stay at home husband. He did no house work, I did it all and he found a job after the first year. By the second year he had found a very good position making over 60K a year (based on a bachelors degree in criminal justice) and hated it. He worked in this position until November. All the while complaining that I wasn't trying hard enough to find him the job of his dreams. When I offered to return back to US after first 2 and 3rd year, he told me no, he wouldn't go back. Then after he slammed me across a table breaking my rib, after all the verbal and mental abuse, after all the broken dishes thrown at walls, the broken window, threatening to kill certain people including myself, and finally when he shook my son like a rag doll in front of a crowd, screaming at him to shut up, I thought I had to get out while I still could.
Okay, got it.
CL-Blueliner4