DV flashback emotions? Need advice on how to deal.
Find a Conversation
|Wed, 03-30-2011 - 10:48am|
Let me preface this by saying, my dh is wonderful. I have a had 2 extremely abusive relationships which have lasted a total of 9 years. It's been years since I divorced my ex.
Last night, I was at a work event and my dh was texting me getting steadily frustrated at having the wrong address and bad directions to come pick me up. He was obviously frustrated and I would be using similar language in the same situation. He was in no way blaming me for the confusion, but after driving around in circles for nearly an hour - he was just pissed.
The problem is... in receiving the text msgs, I got terrified. It was just a whelling up of emotion that I logically knew was competely irrational, but I had absolutely no control over. I had mini-flashbacks of my ex-husband and it triggered a really bad migraine and my uncontrollably crying for literally hours.
I felt bad about how I was feeling and didn't tell my husband the reaon behind it for a couple hours. He is upset that I didn't disclose earlier, so he could stop sending obviously angry text msgs to me. And, he ended up feeling hurt and guilty for causing me to trigger.
So, the questions are (1) how do I better control these flashbacks; (2) do I have a responsibility to tell my dh when they happen; and, (3) does it get better?