He robbed me

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2004
He robbed me
8
Tue, 03-01-2005 - 1:44pm
Checked my account today and seems he made some withdraws. I had the mortgage payment held in a separate account each month as it is paid on a quarterly basis. I was due to pay it the first of April. Unfortunately he withdrew the whole amount of several thousand on Friday, knowing that the money is for the mortgage. In a panic I checked the other accounts and found he cleaned those out too. So I became really stirred up and started checking the investments. Everything is liquidated. So he took off with over 40K in cash. That in addition to the suspected private account he was keeping. The lawyer knows and now we wonder if he will show up at the next court date on Wednesday or perhaps he ditched out of the country knowing it would be extremely difficult for me to get the cash back. One of two things will happen then. He will confront me in court next week and claim it was his right, the judge will get angry, and then??? Or he will not show up and I suppose that is a good thing too. I guess this means the mediation that he initially refused is now over. He divided up the property already, chose his part, and now just need to get the divorce final on the 5th of April. Wow, I am so strung out and upset, I feel like someone who has been robbed, but maybe something good will come out of it......
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2005
In reply to: hglucky
Tue, 03-01-2005 - 2:15pm
Well you did the right thing by contacting your lawyer.
5yrssm 
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
In reply to: hglucky
Tue, 03-01-2005 - 3:14pm

Okay, first things first:


If you are going to not make any payments due to lack of funds, call the companies (mortgage, etc.) and explain the situation.

CL-Blueliner4

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
In reply to: hglucky
Tue, 03-01-2005 - 6:52pm
I have just read your post but have to go to oldest daughter's volleyball practice (I'm asst. coach) but I will post when I get back because I can relate. Talk to you soon!!
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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2001
In reply to: hglucky
Tue, 03-01-2005 - 7:40pm

Luck, believe it or not I have a friend that is named Luck. Never asked her where her name came from, but I know her husband and I met them both at the same time, his name is John. The both of them are the BEST. Anyway, my ex has been stealing from me since the beginning (25 years). He has taken everything away from me, which I never knew until now, and I refuse from this moment on to let him. I have been married to a cop. Don't get me wrong, most cops are great, who are you going to call? Anyway, this has been some day, and please forgive me, I have always been told that I am nothing and today I am taking that back from him. I wish the best for him. especially that he wakes up before he dies and GET'S IT. Take care, be safe and we are here.

Luv Sher

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
In reply to: hglucky
Tue, 03-01-2005 - 7:46pm

ERRRR! What a JERK! Thats why i slowly dwindled our joint account before i had him removed ... actually, i didnt dwindle it, i just stopped being the ONLY person to put anything substantial in it. My STBX suprised me though. i actually LEFT $1200 in it FOR him, & he didnt clean it out, only too $300 the day after he was removed. That actually suprised the heck out of me.

Im sorry, back to YOU! I think the responses you got were right on. No matter what he did, that was 1/2 yours & you are entitled to get it back, even if its thru garnished wages.

The good thing is that as you said, maybe you can get a divorce sooner, then later, based on all of this.

GOOD LUCK! R~

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
In reply to: hglucky
Tue, 03-01-2005 - 9:29pm

Hi again hglucky!!! As promised, I'm back and I will now respond! My STBX decided that ALL of the money was his and cleaned me out...to this day, he has not sent a dime to help me pay the bills or buy groceries...thank GOD for my mom and DHS! Without them, we certainly would have starved to death or frozen, which ever came first. The only thing that I can figure he is doing is trying to cause a foreclosure on our home and put me and our dd (I have another dd from a previous marriage) out on the streets! He isn't thinking too clearly as the courts DO NOT LIKE this sort of behaviour and your STBX is most definitely is going to have to give you half, REGARDLESS!!!

The moves he just made, makes him look VINDICTIVE!!! Not good in the eyes of the court and that doesn't matter what state you live in! That is mean and hateful and it is a derrogatory mark on him! HON, Do the best that you can do and journal everything he is doing...(thats the advice I have gotten on these boards and it WORKED for me today in court), so do it. COVER YOUR BUTT!! The court here ORDERED that there would not be a foreclosure on this house, no matter what!!!! Even if they have to sieze his property to cover the expenses!!! He is not happy with me right now but I don't care!!! You make your bed, you lie in it!!!

Hugs and good luck!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2004
In reply to: hglucky
Thu, 03-03-2005 - 1:08am

Just an update on what the lawyer has done in response to his selfish behavior. I gathered evidence of each of the cashouts. In two of the cases, I have a copy of his signed request for the cash. I admit I had some very horrible thoughts going through my head when I saw his handwriting. I am waiting for the signed request from the other two, though I have a statement from each which shows the transaction. The lawyer sent the copies along with a letter to his lawyer yesterday. She said in the letter that he is to give me half of all the cash by the court session next week, or we would take it to a higher court. She explained to me that in this higher court they would review the papers and judge whether or not he took the cash I suppose. There is no doubt there. The concequence is up to 3 years in jail. She said that was unlikely, but very definite would be that he would have a police record here. She is also sending a letter to the government addressing his request for legal financial support. She argues that he is not a candidate for support because he has money (regardless of how) and that he should be made to pay back all I have had to pay for his court fees.

To add insult to injury, my lawyer received a letter from his yesterday morning before sending out our letter. It was in his words and the first paragraph said he is not obligated to pay child support, just because. In other words he gave no reason. He also asked for sole custody, arguing that I was a bad parent. He explained in one sentence that I was a bad parent because I was too protective. That was the only given reason. He goes on to say that I was at fault for the marriage breakdown because he couldn't find work. Please do not wonder about the logic on that one. And yes, the wording is as I say it here. It makes no sense, makes no argument of any kind, and sounds ridiculous. He continued to argue for spousal support as well.

Let's see what happens.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2005
In reply to: hglucky
Thu, 03-03-2005 - 10:44am
I like your lawyer, she sounds pretty knowledgeable and very headstrong.
5yrssm