Avatar for cajunharmony
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-28-2001
Mon, 08-05-2013 - 9:44am

Hi Everyone!  Just wanted to drop in and give a little update.  Since iVillage made the changeover to "in-house" management of the boards it has been a challenge and a half to log-in, post replies, see new posts.  In other words, a MAJOR hassle to the point of frustrating me so much that I felt I couldn't do the members of the board justice, so I resigned as cl.  Also, cm's were coming and going so rapidly, I never really knew who to address my concerns to.  I did address them to any and everyone I possibly could, and I see that, aside from being able to log in and post now, there is still the problem of newest posts not floating to the top.  This is something that I constantly and consistently expressed concern over because posts were being missed.  When this didn't get addressed, I had to let being cl of the board go, for many reasons. 

I was associated with this board, first as a member, back in 2000.  Then, I was in and out as an unofficial cl for a while, then as a cl for the other board, which was for people who had escaped their abusive relationship and were on their path of healing.  Then that board was closed and I floated back to this one and became a cl.  I moved back to my home state and returned to school to finish up a degree I wanted to get.  With that done, I went to work as the manager of the local domestic abuse agency and shelter.  After working there almost two years, it was time to move on.  This is about the same time iVillage began messing with the boards and making all the changes.  It is also about the time my dd and I began living in my mother's home with her.  (She has a HUGE house and didn't want to live in it by herself.)  I began seeing a man that I have dated off and on for the last 39 YEARS, yes, you read that right, lol!  Finally, after all these years, we are at a time and place in our lives where we can actually have a relationship that is not affected by other people, distance, or me still going through the healing process. 

I know there are people who work in this field for years and years and years.  I am not one of them.  I feel that working with others who are still in abusive relationships or freshly out, benefit greatly from interacting with others in the same position.  I am no longer in that position.  I'm free (the abuser in my life is dead), WO is growing up so fast, my bf is wonderful to me and we have a future together, my life is full, positive and I couldn't be happier.  It is time for someone else to step up and take on leadership of this board.  It was an amazing journey, one that I couldn't have made without the help of this board and the amazing people I have met here.  In fact there is a group of about 30 of us who met here or in a regular chat group who still stay in touch.  Recovering from abuse is not easy, simple or achieved in a day, a month, or even a year.  For me, it's been a 14 year journey.  Yes, there have been a few times in the last few months that I've been slightly triggered, but only for a few seconds.  I feel healed, completely, in every way and am moving on with my life, so it was time for me to bid the board adieu.  Just wanted to pop in and give some sort of explanation.  Hope you all make it to this place in your lives as well.  It is SO worth the journey to get here.

Mama Harmony

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-15-2012
Wed, 08-07-2013 - 9:52am

Preach that stuff! 


iVillage Member
Registered: 12-16-2001
Sat, 09-28-2013 - 5:47am

OMG Harmony!!!! I remember you. I also went back and forth with Ivillage's shuffling of boards. This is one of the two boards that I started on back in December 2001 (I used to lurk) but became even more active in March of 2002. You are so right about the journey to where we are today being SO right!!!!!