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| Tue, 07-25-2006 - 12:07pm |
I need some advise and some support. I am in a major legal battle for my daughter, 16 months old. First off...I am a 39 year old widowz9husband committed suicide) with 3 children from that marriage. I met Mr. Not so wonderful and fell in love, got pregnant. He left me for his ex girlfriend the first month I was pregnant...so that being said...
He is an emotional abuser and has physically abused me twice. He meses with my mind and makes me 'feel' like I am losing my mind. He says that I am suicidal and abusing my 16 month old. Both is not true. Anyway I have to go to court to prove my innocence. I have felt like' giving up"...but not die. I woiuld not do that to my children.
He is the crazy one. The diagnosed him as a physchopath. Help me...How can i win this battle. The courts scares me to death.

Hi,
My ex also is mentally ill and abusive and he kept telling me I was crazy and has been using the courts/custody fight as another venue to keep torturing me emotionally, accusing me of suffering from mental illnesses, depression, etc. Your ex, like mine, is trying to project his own problems onto you, because he doesn't want to take responsibility for his actions and mental state, and he wants to use your child as a way to keep control over you. You need to remember that what he says, his version of reality, is a pack of lies. Don't believe any of it. During my marriage, I was so isolated (part of my ex's abuse) that I didn't question his version of reality. I still believed him a year after the divorce! When I look back at the marriage, it's as though he were a cult leader and I was part of his "cult" and I think that recovering from a seriously emotionally abusive relationship is a bit like escaping a cult situation or a long-term situation in terms of recovering from the brainwashing. Have you heard of the Stockholm Syndrome?
I also recommend you look up custodyprepformoms.org. I wish I'd found them at the beginning of the custody fight! Really excellent tips on keeping yourself physically and mentally healthy and on avoiding very common pitfalls.
Best of luck.
Hugs
I think you meant to direct your response to the OP, Stacy47150, not intuition_girl.
Big hugs, Stacy, stay strong and keep posting.