How could I be so stupid...
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| Fri, 03-24-2006 - 10:35pm |
He had stopped calling ...harassing ...etc ..for at least a week ...I actually thoguht for a second that thigns were looking up .....
I went to get my kids from his moms ...he was there ....extremly nice to me ....until I tried to leave ...
Then it got ugly ...He wanted to know (since he has been good ) if he could stop by tomorrow night to see the kids ,at my house .I told him NO ..tomorrow night is YOUR night and I am bringing them to you .he said "WHY so you can go out "I said NO ..I just need a night to myself .thats all .,..(I was in the car this whole time trying to leave )we got into an argument about it (him accusing me of going out )and I kept begging him to just let me leave ..but he wouldnt get away from my window ...kept his hands on the car ...."WHAT did I do ..I have done nothing wrong
..I want to talk to you ..dont leave "
I was crying histerically "PLEASE just let me leave " by this time my kids are very upset ..and he s blaming me for that bc I yelled at him (which is true ) BUt if he had gotten off of my car and let me leave than I wouldnt have yelled .
next thing I know he is INSIDE my car ...trying to *TALK* to me after I have asked him repeatedly to leave me alone ..."What did I do ????I did nothing wrong "is all he kept saying over and over again ...and all I was trying to do was leave ...finally he backed away from the car ...for a split second ...and I gunned it out of the driveway ..I almost ran him over bc he tried to stop the car ...It wont happen again ...this is absolutley the last straw..I already sleep wit ha knife in my hand bc I have nightmares that he is breaking in the house ...I cant handle it anymore ..I am 2 seconds from packing up and moving across the world ...

It sounds to me like this is something the police might need to know about. I can't recall if you have a restraining order, but if you do, this is almost certainly a violation. If you don't, you may want to think about getting one.
This is also a good time to invoke my "No Explanations" rule. You already know about No Contact, which for you means that you talk about the kids and nothing else. No Explanations ties into that. Do not, for any reason, attempt to explain your decisions, actions, or anything else to an abuser. The reason for this is that he doesn't really want to know why you're doing it. What he wants is to find an opening to argue with you and wear you down, and providing explanations gives him an opportunity to do that. SIL had to do this with Al the Evil; the hard part of it is that it goes against the very human tendency to think that if you can only get them to understand, they'll start behaving sensibly. But, the rules of normal human interaction do not have a lot of effect on abusers. Just some food for thought.