how do i break it off?
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how do i break it off?
| Sun, 07-16-2006 - 3:20am |
My last message post explains most of my story so I will be brief. I have realized that I am in an unhealthy relationship. He is emotionally and verbally abusive and i am afraid it will escalate to more physical things. My only problem is that i have been with him for three years (since i was 16) and he has been treating me bad for about two of those years. I have become so used to it that i feel scared to leave him. We have broken up 3 times and evertime i give in to him. The last time he cut himself and made sure that i knew about it. I couldnt keep myself away from him when we broke up, he would cry, threaten to kill himself. anything to keep my in arms reach. How do i break it off? How do i stop myself from falling back into the cycle?

Take care and be strong for yourself. Bev
All the other posters who have told you to get out now are right--there's no time like the present to seek your freedom. As to how you can go about it, remember this: he is going to make it all your fault; he is going to tell you you're the bad guy; he is going to beg, plead, cry, threaten to hurt himself, swear he'll never do it again, promise that he's come to his senses, and none of it is true.
Just focus on what you need FOR YOURSELF, and let the rest go by. Say, "This relationship isn't working for me. I need time to myself," and keep saying it. You can do it. Good luck!
The suicide thing is nothing new among abusers. I will tell you the story of mine, who used to like to threaten that one. One day, I snapped and said, "Fine. Do it!" That was six years ago, and the last DH and I heard, Loony was still alive and kicking.
It's just another tactic- don't let it stop you from doing what you need to do. I think a good place to start is by checking out our webpage, accessible through the link at the top of the start page. The emotional manipulators are tough to deal with, but it CAN be done!