Husband "accidentally" hurts me?!

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2011
Husband "accidentally" hurts me?!
2
Thu, 08-18-2011 - 11:41pm
My husband has lately been hurting me and pretending that it is an accident, mostly when his parents are around. Some examples: he'll step backwards onto my toes, he'll push a stroller into my stomach, he'll elbow me and pretend he is stretching. He'll immediately apologize and say it was an accident, but i know him, and he's a terrible actor. He also will walk by me and growl things in my ear that I can't understand, then deny he said anything. It seems to only happen when his parents are around. Lol. Why would someone do this?! The last few times, I've confronted him right when it happened, and his parents overheard, but he just denied it and acted extra nice to me. It was very awkward because it is a strange thing to accuse someone of....Sort of makes me look a little crazy. What do you think? Is that his intention?
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2009
Fri, 08-19-2011 - 12:17am

Maybe he's "gaslighting" you?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-03-2011
Fri, 08-19-2011 - 9:35am
That is very similar to what happened with my first fiancee. We would be driving and all of a sudden he would backhand me, then act like nothing happened. Or elbow me in the chest, and pretend it didn't happen or it was an accident. When I would bring it up, he would deny ever doing it or that it was on purpose. He made me think I was completely crazy. It escalated over the years and got pretty bad. You should take this seriously, and not allow him to continue this behavior. It can be awkward situation that can make you feel like your going crazy and doubt yourself, but trust me - he knows exactly what he's doing.