I can't believe what is happening...

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
I can't believe what is happening...
4
Thu, 04-14-2005 - 8:54pm

Those of you who know my story know that in July, 2001 my husband attacked me and choked and threatened to kill me, I fought back...I called the police and they arrested me...I spent the weekend in jail and then had to appear in court that following Monday. While waiting for my name to be called, my stbx met with the ADA (I never spoke to anyone form that office) and she told him that I had to plead guilty or I would spend a year in jail for domestic violence. My husband told me that if I didn't plead quilty, he would leave me, take our 2yo dd and I would never see her again. Well, I plead guilty and I assure you I was not/am not guilty of domestic violence. I was given a deferred sentence, with 36 weeks of classes and because there was alcohol involved, 24 hours of alcohol classes as well. Needless to say, because of my dad's brain cancer and the surgeries I had to have, I could not fulfill my deferred sentence. In November, 2003, my probation was revoked, and I was sentenced to 180 days in jail w/work release.

Anyway, I hired an appeals laywer who had the sentence stayed, and he went to bat for me. That was in December of 2003. As of today, my appeal was denied and I will soon stand in front of the same judge so that I can go to jail...my heart is breaking because after what the GAL wrote in regards to my dd's safety at her dad's, he will get soul custody of her and while I am in jail, he will finally get the chance to take her somewhere I will never see her again. I'm so scared of what will happen to her! I'm so tempted to run with her myself and never look back! There will be nothing that I can do to stop him!!!!

I am not guilty of anything but defending myself! I am innocent of these charges but I can't help but think how many more innocent people are scarred for life because their abuser's know how to manipulate us and the law! This really sucks!

I ended up taking the GAL report to my appeals attorney who says that this might possibly shed a whole nother light on my situation and if the judge decides to put me in jail, he might possibly be held accountable for any harm that could come to my dd. This is a last ditch effort to stop the madness that my stbx has created for me. Please pray that the courts see this for the truth, as even my 6 yo dd told the GAL that when her dad and I were together he used to "beat my mom up all the time".

I can barely see through the tears and fears that I am feeling now! How can this be happening? Now his attorney is filing for a continuance in hopes that I will be in jail before my final divorce hearing where custody will be decided once and for all! OMG! I can't just stand by and let him have her! She will suffer greatly because of him!

Some kind words please!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2003
Fri, 04-15-2005 - 12:02am
I'm praying that the judge will see sense and this travesty will be headed off. I've no idea what else to say. I'm so sorry you're going through this.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Sat, 04-16-2005 - 2:05pm

Thank you so much for your reply! I'm so hoping that he now realizes that I am not guilty of domestic violence and that it is my STBX who has manipulated, coerced and threatened me into defending myself. I just have to keep the faith...which is very hard for me to do at this time.

Melanie

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2005
Sat, 04-16-2005 - 3:42pm
Oh honey, I am so terribly sorry about all this.
5yrssm 
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Sun, 04-17-2005 - 2:19pm
Mel,i am praying that this last ditch effort works! I have faith it will ... it HAS TOO! xo

R~

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