I did it! I finally stood up for myself!
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|Wed, 03-26-2003 - 11:43am|
Well yesterday I suddenly realized that I don't have to hide my plans from him any more. And I don't have to worry and wait to see what he will try to hit me with next as I work on getting a new custody & visitation agreement so that I can move.
So I called him and I told him straight out that I am planning to move. I told him that I planned to preserve the amount of vistation time he has now, but that it will be in a different form. I told him that I will be leaving (I was smart though, I did not say when), and it is my right under Supreme Court law to move. I have custody and he has visitation, so he is fortunate I am willing to be flexible and work with an alternative vistation for the future.
For once he was actually listening to me, so I gave him a heaping helping of the truth. I told him that he has what he has now...his business, his contracts, his employees, my former friends...because I kept my mouth shut about the fact that he is a sex offender. But because of his actions, he has destroyed the foundations of my previous life. I lost my job, my friends, my future security, my business that was just starting to go. I am keeping my mouth shut for the sake of the children. I hope they never know what their father did, because it nearly destroyed me.
I told him to call his lawyer tomorrow and set up a court date for May. I told him that there is no reason for him to keep delaying any longer. The 730 evaluation to create an alternative custody and vistation will be over in 4-6 weeks if ex cooperates. Ex has already delayed 2 weeks and I told him I would not tolerate any more delay. I told him that at this point, I am willing to make a reasonable arrangement to take my half of the value of the business. But he needs to work with me now.
I felt SO GOOD after that! I felt like the big balloon of stress inside of me had popped and for the first time in years I am at peace. I went out into my garden and drew flowers with my new chalk crayons. All of a sudden I have found that I can actually draw! My ex had kept me thinking I was unable to do the creative things I did as a younger person. I feel like the real me is finally coming out. And I like this person LOL.
Just had to share a little joy at the ending section here. I could not have been here without your support. Love Debi