It just keeps getting worse
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| Mon, 09-25-2006 - 7:13am |
As I wait on the wait list to speak with a DV counselor, more unbearable things are happening EVERYDAY. Last night my abusive husband didn't come home. My 7 year old daughter has been asking constantly where is daddy? Although he says very little to her. In fact, only when she says something to him...sometimes. Just when I thought the feelings of withdraw from this person is the worst, the abusive pattern is imparted in my daughter. This is the worst.I'm worried if he will pay his share of the mortgage until the house sells, if he will pay his share of my daughter's child care cost and all of the other bills that we have. I'm worried if my credit will be sooo ruined that I won't be able to secure another residence. I guess that an abuser always keeps his victim off balance and in terror. What a way to NOT live.
I believe in the end and in time, I'll make it through this but the road looks long and treacherous. I'm sooooo scared. I will speaking with an attorney this week.

Have you thought about calling the Domestic Abuse Hotline? You will be able to talk with someone. I think it would help you especially because you are still waiting to talk with a DV counsellor.
In a way, it's a blessing that your husband didn't come home. He is not very nice to you or your daughter. He doesn't care about your feelings, he doesn't care about your daughters feelings. He only cares about himself. He is very selfish. He is purposley doing this. He knows that he is hurting you and I really think he is doing this on purpose. The abusers mind is really screwed up and totally backwards.
The road will be long, but there will be sunshine on the other end. This in one of my favourite quotes, for that reason: "If you want the rainbow, you gotta get thru the rain!" It really is great for you situation. Just try to remember that you will get thru this. You deserve so much more than this man.
Call the DV hotline. You will be able to speak with someone. I think it would really help you. Also, keep posting away. I want to know how you are doing. Okay? We are always around.. and we are here for you. :)
Hugs. Lauren