It's been a year and I'm sooo frustrated

Avatar for butterflyqueen7
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2003
It's been a year and I'm sooo frustrated
1
Wed, 10-05-2005 - 11:28pm
Hi guys...well this month marks my one year anniversary of freedom, woo hoo!!!
I'm very excited about that, but very upset that I still can't get him to leave me alone. He tries everything he can to control and manipulate me. He knows the one thing he can use against me is our 2 yr old son. He has visitation every other weekend Fri-Sun plus one additional 24 hr period in the month. He hasn't seen him since the beginning of Sept because he volunteered for Natl guard duty for the hurricane relief (for the money, not to help, of course). He wants to take him Thurs-Sun this wkend and I refused. Just the other day he was saying he only wanted him 1 day because he would be too tired...but as soon as I asked him if I could bring him Sat instead of Fri so I could stay with my mom who is having surgery on Friday, he says he wants him 4 days! In his freaking dreams!
To top it off, he has been calling me at least once a day, and usually emailing and text messaging several times a week, too. He alternates between calling me "love names" (sweetie, baby, hon) and saying mean and disrespectful things about me or my boyfriend. I have told him in no uncertain terms SEVERAL TIMES that he has to stop ALL of this crap or I will go to the police for harrassment, and he will stop for a while, then pick it back up gradually.
A lot of the time I don't even answer my phone when I know it's him. I ignore his text messages and don't reply to his emails. I talk to him only when I have to because of DS. And still he does this! Also, he told me he is quitting his job because he isn't making enough money--and he hasn't paid me child support for 2 months--and a friend overheard him say that he was quitting so that it was less money for the ex wife. !! Guess he doesn't realize that he is depriving his child as well. And to top it off, my BF is a cop and is getting really uneasy about his behavior...is afraid he is going to try something. And my best friend's DH (also a cop) has been in LA with EX for the hurricane, and he told her to tell me to be extra careful and watch my back because he also thinks EX is planning something. So now I want to go out and purchase a stockload of weapons. I hate him so much for still having this control over me!! Any advice?? Thanks for reading.
B
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-29-2005

Butterfly, not knowing all the circumstances, it sounds like time to go for a restraining order.