Just plain sad at the moment

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-12-2004
Just plain sad at the moment
1
Mon, 02-07-2005 - 6:38am
I was in such a good mood today until I came home, we had an ok weekend. Went out for tea Friday had a fight before hand and went without him which did not go down well. I went to my gf house and he kept smsing me until with the ususal guilt trips and subtle threats so I went home and he was all sorry. So then Sat I took the girls to my dad's as he had a bucks night to go to and I thought I would go out with a gf. The sms's started again so I rang and told him to stop it and goodnight. 11pm rocks around we had a bite to eat and then went to a pub which was so much fun but my gf wanted to go so we did. He sms's me again I am driving so I don't answer then again and then again. I ring him and at this point get angry with him and have a go at him telling him to leave me alone, he is all well I just wanted to let you know I was on my way home and wanted to see if you wanted to come home or I could come over or pick you up! I tell him to let me be....so I am sitting at my gf's and she finally gets what I am talking about with his manipulation. She is single and has kind of not understood why we are breaking up, she has only ever seen Mr Nice guy. So she finally says 'can't he just leave you alone and give you a break!' So needless to say I was so nervous that he was drunk and going to come over there as she lives 5 minutes away from our house, I got so uncomfortable that I had to go home. I went to bed and luckly he left me alone the next day we had a big row and he was his usual charming self, I basically gave in and started crying to which he turned into the caring concerned husband after he had been so mean in the first place to make me cry!! aarrrhhhh so tonight ( I am in Australia) I am numb I think nothing happened actually he has been really nice, cooked dinner talked house stuff etc I am just sitting her feeling numb, I am really tired as well! My tummy has been grumbling all day I hope its not a bad sign.....I want to cry but I don't want him to see me. He keeps coming in and asking me if I am ok. I feel quilty for being on here like I am doing something wrong, I think its cause he has drilled into me that he doesn't like me talking about him to my little computer friends blah blah blah. I can't wait till the house is sold and I can move on with my life!!! Bye guys I am off to make the couch my new best friend I can't think any more
M
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-10-2005
Mon, 02-07-2005 - 12:08pm
I can feel for you right now and am sending you many hugs. So much of what you have written really touches a chord in me as well. It makes it so much harder that you have to wait to sell the house. Take care of yourself as best as you can- eat something if you can!- and I hope you can take some comfort in knowing that I am thinking of you and wishing you well. BTW, I think it's great that you were hanging out with your gf. Keep that up!