a little freaked out

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-14-2005
a little freaked out
14
Wed, 01-11-2006 - 11:43am

I just checked one of my email accounts, and there were three very recent emails from my lunatic ex that had "kill you" as part of his email address. In the subject line of each email he said some very mean things.

He has been court ordered to not contact me in any way, but I can't prove he sent these emails.

What do I do?

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Avatar for adryl
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Wed, 01-11-2006 - 1:56pm

OK, I'm no expert - a long way from it in fact, but I think there is a way to trace an e-mail back to the computer from which it originated. If someone could do that, and it was his home or work computer, then your case would be pretty strong that he sent them. I would report them regardless - I mean, what's the liklihood of some other lunatic getting your e-mail address? I've never received anything threatening via e-mail, and I get some pretty crazy things.

Just my opinion.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2004
Wed, 01-11-2006 - 4:41pm

Don't respond and get thee to a police station now. He is in violation of a court order and they can trace him back to his IP address for prosecution.

Please be aware of your surroundings and it would be a good idea to put your safety plan back in effect.

Take this seriously and call the local DV shelter as well. You never know if someone is serious about killing you or not and I don't think you really want to know if he is or isn't.

Be safe.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Wed, 01-11-2006 - 7:43pm

Ditto.


Move all of those emails onto a disc, full headers included, and get to the police station NOW.

CL-Blueliner4

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-29-2005
Wed, 01-11-2006 - 8:16pm
Chiming in to agree with the others, but if you want to try tracing & reporting the email yourself, go to arin.net and use the "whois" tool.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2004
Wed, 01-11-2006 - 11:47pm
It is certainly possible to trace an email to the originating server. In my 2002 MS Outlook, you right click on an email and select . A window will pop up with a mess of text at the bottom in the 'Internet Headers' field. This is what you can use to trace an email by selecting the entire text, copying and pasting to a tracing application. There is all of the information concerning where the email originated, and where it was pinged to before arriving to you. To make sense of it, do a search on google for 'internet headers email tracing' and you will find such sites as http://www.expita.com/header1.html. I didn't thoroughly look through what is available to help you, but this should be a good start. There are some sites/softwares that allow you to paste in the internet headers information and it spits out a readable account of where it came from, even down to the city, service provider, and original computer. On broadband, this will usually be a service provider server though. But it would allow you to contact the service provider to complain about a customer with that particular email. However, I think with yahoo addresses and perhaps other webmail, it becomes a bit more difficult. I haven't experimented with it too much so don't know for sure. Hope that helps though.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-05-2004
Wed, 01-11-2006 - 11:48pm
See Blue's post. I will also second the idea to contact the ISP. They can help you prove that they came from his account; it is indeed possible to do so, even if he used free e-mail.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-14-2005
Thu, 01-12-2006 - 9:29am

Hello everyone,

Thanks so much for all your replies. The first thing I did was to save the emails, print them out, and then I printed out the message source info which is available when you right click, go to properties, click on details, and then message source. I immediately recognized one of the IDs as being his. He's the only one of three people who knows about that account anyway. That email account doesn't even get junk mail.

I called the police and an officer came over last night. He was very sympathetic but wasn't up on email abuse and suggested I go to the magistrate. I went to the magistrate with the emails & source info, and she said there was nothing she could do without proof. In other words, I need his name on this stuff somewhere. I said the proof was in his computer, but she said there was nothing she could do.

I've contacted Hotmail, and I'll be doing a whole lot of research today, because I know it's entirely possible to track these emails back to him. I'm not giving up because I sincerely believe he's threatening my life, and I want him in prison.

It's been a year since I broke up with him, and six months since I've even seen him, spoken to him, or been in contact with him in any way. He's never before made any life threatening comments to me, and until about a month ago,he'd never sent emails to that address. It started with one every couple of weeks with just a hello in the subject line. When I didn't respond, I guess he really got ticked off. I was just stunned when I saw it all yesterday. Absolutely stunned. He just won't let it go. He's been stewing about it all for a year!

I'm definitely keeping my eyes & ears open and taking all precautions. I sure didn't sleep well last night.

I'll keep you updated, and if I find anything that help may be helpful to you all, I'll be sure to let you know.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Sat, 01-14-2006 - 2:11am

ISP addresses DO tell what computer an email was sent from. I very recently had STBX's atty try to say I had STBX's password & was sending **MYSLEF** the emails i said HE sent.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Sat, 01-14-2006 - 2:12am
GREAT suggesstion!
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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-14-2005
Sat, 01-14-2006 - 8:03am
That was the first thing I did. I printed out the headers with all that info and showed it to the policeman. He didn't really know what to do with it. I showed it to the magistrate, and she said there was nothing she could do without a name. I guess I'm going to have to get a lawyer and a computer expert. It's very frustrating. Fortunately, I haven't heard anything else from the lunatic, and as far as I can tell, he hasn't been creeping around. I wish he would come by here because then at least I could catch him with my cameras and get the police over here. I'm going to make sure I follow this up, though. There's no way I'm putting up with this.

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