Molestation or just weird parenting?
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|Thu, 07-28-2011 - 10:43am|
I almost feel like I'm borrowing trouble by even vocalizing this thought. I've never actually said it out loud and whenever my therapist have headed this directions, I'm pretty good at wiggling out of it. But, lately - especially with all this crap with my mother and thinking about my childhood - I keep coming back to the same thing and wondering.
I think... no, I don't even want to say that.... How would you know if you were molested or sexually abused as a child? I mean... is there like a list of what is appropriate behavior for an adult to child and not appropriate behavior? I know the way I am with kids and my own child is very different than the way I was brought up... but I don't know really what those differences qualify as... like if my upbringing was just "weird" or is it "molestation" or if they are just a different way of parenting. I just don't know.
I know, when I've looked at the signs and red flags for children who have been molested... I see myself in alot of those... like the early sexualization. Like when playing with dolls/barbies as young as 3 or 4 - my barbies were always having sex. I got caught playing very graphic versions of "doctor" quite a bit when I was between 2 and 4. I remember explaining to my friend when we were only 5 or 6 how sex worked and the different holes women have. Things like that as "red flags."
Should I even be worrying about this? I worry about "false memories" and things like that. I would never want to attribute something to someone when I'm not 100% of exactly what it all means. Are there any good website resources on this?