Physical custody of kids w/i H knowledge

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Physical custody of kids w/i H knowledge
4
Mon, 08-09-2004 - 12:53pm

Is it at all possible (does anyone know) if a parent can "secretively" obtain at *least* temporary sole physical custody of kids? I live in PA. I can't find much information and I thought I should know a little before I contact a lawyer. Trust me, I'll be back for support. Right now I'm working on minimal time online.


Thanks for any help. :o)


~Me

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Mon, 08-09-2004 - 12:58pm

Hi Blessed and welcome -


First thing to check out is www.womenslaw.org.

CL-Blueliner4

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-10-2003
Mon, 08-09-2004 - 1:25pm
Hi, Blessed, and thanx for posting! I'm the paralegal Blueliner mentioned in her post.

As far as I know, there is no way to file for actual custody (even temporarily) without him being informed of it. BUT -- if you file for a temporary restraining order (TRO) to protect both yourself *AND* the kids (this is key!), the judge will most likely grant you temporary custody.

At the TRO hearing, no one will be present but you, your lawyer, and officers of the Court (judge, bailiff, clerks, etc.). He WILL NOT be there! And the judge will probably grant the TRO -- they almost always do.

Now, the TRO will only last for about a week, until the hearing on your permanent restraining order. At that hearing, he will be permitted to show up and state his case. Of course, by this time, you've already got a TRO, and if the Court *does* grant the permanent restraining order at the hearing, then that's one strike against him as far as an eventual custody hearing is concerned. The Court will be *much* less inclined to grant him custody if there is a restraining order out there against him, ESPECIALLY if that restraining order is to protect the kids who are the subject of your custody action. Of course, this works well if the kids are with you, but not so well if they're with him right now. Are you out yet? If not, do you plan to take the kids with you when you leave or do you plan to kick him out and keep the kids in your home? Do you have any evidence of physical abuse against you and/or the children? Please post again, and give me a little more info. Also, if you feel comfortable, you can e-mail me through my profile. I'm located in Franklin County (southcentral PA), so I don't know if I'm close to you or not.

Love & Hugs,

Emm

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Tue, 08-10-2004 - 12:53am

I'm in Crawford County. I have the kiddos. No evidence of physical abuse. He works out of town now. He is actually due home tomorrow night. We have errands to run Wednesday. On Friday is my appointment with Women's Services for counseling and to create a plan of action. He thinks things are fine now. When I tried to seperate from him last week it was hell and I wasn't ready for what happened. I'm trying to ready myself now.


Thank you for any information you want to give.


:)


~Me

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2003
Tue, 08-10-2004 - 12:31pm
In PA it is almost impossible to do that secretively. There will have to be a hearing whether you go for the RO/PFA or not. You can see an attorney without his knowledge and request that a "guardian en lighten" (i think that is how it is spelled) by appointed for your children, and that can be done without his knowledge and the guardian then represents the child(ren) and makes the decision on where custody should lay. Once the guardian is established, then custody is kind of frozen (unless iminent danger is present) until the guardian presents his decision.

I have never had a RO/PFA (stupid me...lol) against my DH, but after many months of custody going nowhere (i live in PA, but my DH in NJ)and DH trying some very underhanded things, like lying to the court where the child lives, etc. my attorney got angry and filed for this guardian for my son, which means I have temp. residential custody until the court/guardian determine otherwise.

Not sure if that helps but you can call and check into it.