Question........

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2005
Question........
2
Tue, 01-31-2006 - 12:33am

Do abusers love to make you feel worthless all the time?
I do not speak to my stbx on the phone (he does not live at home anymore) but he asked my older dd to put me on while he blasted me for the high phone bill which he currently pays. He speaks to me disrespectfully and always likes to put in "while you were sitting at home running up the phone bill." He has no appreciation for someone who takes care of the home. He knows I have been going on interviews.
I have also been fighting a serious depression, which I will only be able to take care of once my insurance is okayed. But my question is: even after you are no longer with them, do they constantly try to make you feel like you are worth nothing?
Let me just add that he tried to do me in. He tried to destroy me. His only purpose for marrying me was to run me into the ground. My father has money and he saw a chance to use me and manipulate me. We did not ask him for money, however.
I used to be a girl that everyone used to say has "star quality." I look at myself and I am not the same person. I feel embarassed of myself and my life. He tried to destroy me. I cannot believe that he treated me like I was some girl of the street. He has to be the most depraved person in the world. I will never forgive him for the time he took away from me and for treating me that way. Once I am completely on my own financially, the door will be locked. I do not want to speak to him again. And I will go to lawyers and social advocates to tell them of the emotional abuse I suffered at his hands and the way he tried to make me feel. I will never forgive him for this.




Edited 1/31/2006 12:45 am ET by smoothride
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-29-2005
Tue, 01-31-2006 - 7:07am

Personal opinion, they believe they have the right to punish us for escaping.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-05-2004
Tue, 01-31-2006 - 11:22am
Oh my yes, they certainly do love to make you feel worthless! The hope is that, if you think you are worth nothing, you will go back to them and they can get back their punching bag. Is there any way you can refuse to take his calls? Every opportunity he gets to talk to you is a chance for him to cut you down even further.
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