Sad/Getting Fed Up
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Sad/Getting Fed Up
| Mon, 11-01-2004 - 7:45am |
Whelp, Mr. Wonderful went on a business trip for 4 days to Phoenix, came home with presents/saying he missed us, etc., and then had the nerve to tell me he almost stayed down there - insinuating that life with us was so bad he was going to abandon his family. This was at the dinner table when I'd gone out of my way to make one of his favorite meals (chili), and dd was asleep. I asked him why he didn't, and why he had to be nasty enough to say that after he had acted so much like he missed us. I got up from the table, threw my bowl away and went down to the barn to play with my horses a minute - at least they are honest and don't act like they like you when they don't. He is upset and mad now because he put some more weight back on during this trip - he is 5'6 or 5'7 (tells everybody he's 5'10) and weighs around 220 - he lifted weights in high school, and his doctor has told him he's not really fat - just muscular, but he still makes himself (and us) miserable about it - was snarling about it this morning - like it was my fault. I don't think me, or anybody else for that matter, is capable of having him be happy with his life - too much baggage he's carrying around. I have flat out told him several times if he doesn't like it around our house to leave, but the bottom line is I'm afraid I won't make it financially without him, our dd is attached to him, I'll lose my job, etc. I worked my rear end off many years to get this job - have to work alot of overtime between January and March or April every year, and I'm just not ready to give it up yet. I know he's blaming me for his weight gain - he really can't do that this time because I wasn't even there! He had a weight problem when I met him - he's the type to sit around and whine about it instead of walking on the treadmill or getting outside to walk around and exercise. I'm sorry, I hit the nail on the head when I asked him last night why is it that before a couple is married, whatever one person does is really appreciated, but after you get married it's just taken for granted. He asked if I thought he took me for granted, and I replied I think we're both guilty of that. Bottom line is he's hanging around a guy who is divorced and has a girlfriend at his work which is probably why he's divorced. DH is giving me the silent treatment this morning = good, I don't want to hear from him anyway. He usually emails me 2 or 3 times a day. I probably have another one who is going to bounce off me until he's strong enough to be on his own and then will dump me again - and our child. Lucky me - I sure have a knack for finding them. Sorry this is so down, I can't help it.
Oh yes, and now I'm having to work for a supervisor who tried to have an affair with me 2 or 3 years ago - that's really thrilling! He doesn't bother me now, but it's still uncomfortable and I sure as heck can't talk about it with my spouse! Nobody else in the office knows - I don't think.

Oh, lordy.
CL-Blueliner4