This sucks!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-12-2005
This sucks!
5
Thu, 08-17-2006 - 6:49am
Good morning. I am the mother of 2 kids, my daughter is 9 and my son is 1. (yes, BIG age gap!!!) I was brought up in a very abusive household and now I'm doing it to my kids. My husband thinks its not abuse because he doesn't "hit or punch" me. Just yells, screams, shoves, grabs, spits, etc. The only thing holding me back from commiting suicide are my children and the fact that my brother commited suicide 3 years ago and I refuse to put my kids through that whole mess. I don't have a car, no job, nothing. I'm in our house all the time. I think it's his way of control. He thinks I'm sleeping with the neighborhood drunks that hang out next door to us, yeah, in the 2-3 hours per day that I have when my boy is sleeping, I have to vacume, do dishes, laundry, etc. I can't take him(my husband) anymore and the shelters around here are all in BAD parts of town. I am so unhappy and I just don't know what I can do. Should I try to talk to him, maybe see if he/we can get help? I can't go on this way. I have noone to talk to, no place to go. What can I do, I'm losing my mind!
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-20-2006
Thu, 08-17-2006 - 10:55am

You poor thing :(
That sounds horrible,i'm going thruogh the same thing with my bf. When he argues with me its all about screaming. Its a horrible way to live. You deserve so much better.

There is a really good site you can check out www.youarenotcrazy.com that site is very helpful and it will give you good insight

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2004
Thu, 08-17-2006 - 11:24am
Heather, even though the shelters are in bad parts of town, that doesn't mean that they are unsafe or staffed by incompetents. Frankly, your situation sounds so awful that I think a shelter would come as a blessed relief. Please just call them and tell them of your concerns. Since they aren't selling their services, I'm sure they'll be straight forward with you.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-29-2005
Fri, 08-18-2006 - 7:22pm

Hon, shoving and spitting are physical abuse.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Sun, 08-20-2006 - 1:04am
Honey, help IS out there. I know those shelters may not be what you want right now, but where you AND your children are, is NO BETTER. Your kids, especially the older one, has got to be so scared, every day.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-05-2004
Tue, 08-22-2006 - 10:47am

As other posters have said, you just have to ask yourself- which is worse, the shelter or letting this go on? Remember that you won't have to stay there forever, and they can help you end this.

Just try giving them a call, I say. You might not even have to stay there specifically- they might be able to help you make other plans. You won't know until you try!

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