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| Fri, 02-25-2005 - 12:35am |
Hi all,
Just wanted to touch base and let you all know how things are going. I am still hanging in there. went to the doctor yesterday and he put me some meds but for nerves and sleeplessness.
Start councling on Tuesday. Finally got in to see someone, the shelter here does not provide any they do not have the funding as of yet.
Any way I started school last Tuesday. it feels good .
I have my ups and down and emotions are flying all over the place expecially with my ann approaching next week. I don't know wheather to cry or what.
It is alot harder than I thought it would be. I know its going to get better once healing really starts. I don't know how to deal with all the emotions that are surfacing.
Its been a month now since I left. Someone please tell me it gets easier!!!
after 13 years with someone you have a tendancy to miss them in one way or another. I will not go back.
Depression is also trying to settle in but I refuse I am fighting it with all I have.
Thank you all for being there when I had no one.
Snow

Holy...has it already been a month??
It will definitely get easier.
CL-Blueliner4
Hi Snow!
I too have only been out liek 3-4 weeks after over 5 years of being with the man I thought I would spend the rest of my days with. However, I am slowly getting stronger and slowly feel that I will get over him. When I was in "it", I just remember feeling like I loved him so much, I will never ever be able to leave. Now, I read and print these posts every single day, I read them over and over and I think about how he took the control away from me.
I love having control over my life again. I too get depressed and sad alot of the time, and feel I have no one. I go home after work and cannot get motivated to do anything. Am afraid to do too much. I can just say I am taking each day one day at at time and am trying not to overwhelm myself with too much change early on. I DO NOT want to relapse and go back to him. Change has always been difficult for me so I am not trying to change anything else (other than getting him out) in my life at this time. I am just grieving right now. I realize I need time to grieve.
I have also been watching cops and court TV alot lately. I think it is helping me work through my severe trauma that I endured. I had to call the cops so many times sometimes on a weekly basis. Watching "cops" makes me remember the bad and stay away. It really works for me. It makes me "not" want to go back. For me, thinking about his druggie friends and his dirty lifestyle really awakens me. I watch one episode of cops and I am like, THANK the GOD above for his departure. I have so many horrible, horrible memories. For me I stayed waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too long. I should have been gone 4 years ago. He knew that I would tolerate so much abuse that he just kept piling it on me.
Lynn
Oh, Sha, it is SOOO good to hear from you!
Mama Harmony
Hi,
well here is a link to the minor details of what happen there is a article on the net that was published the day after Like I said it gives minor details but gives you an idea of the out come. There was 1 person killed. that is all I know and to be honest I don't care to find out anything else.
http://www.sulphurpolice.com/news/special/Midday%20Pursuit%20Through%20Sulphur.htm
I am going to school for unit coornator(hospital adm. duties)
I know I am going to come out ok it is just harder than I thought but I am glad to be home with my family who support me and who are helping me.
I have not beem able to go to Mardi Gras I wish I could have.
Snow
Mama Harmony