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| Tue, 10-19-2004 - 2:07pm |
I was going to post this on both boards since most of you I know spend most of your time there. Don't laugh!!! But, I couldn't figure it out. LOL...
Anyway, first let me say Blue, you and Buff were right. I did need time to heal. I've taken it to. Gotta say I'm enjoying every minute of it. It's amazing how you forget who you are when someone else is controlling you. The kiddo's are doing great. All those anger problems they were having have almost faded completely away. With the help of some counseling. I've recently gotten approved for financial aid and will start school in Spring. Physical Therapy is what I'm leaning toward. As far as the divorce goes....still nothing. For the meantime I'm content. I'd love to get closure on this mess I made, but I've realized he's not really worth my worries. I have too many other things going on to think about it. It is moving though. Which is fine for the time being. Still living in my house...actually remodeling a little bit. I stay busy between working full time and being an over time single mommy. I gotta say I'm so much happier. I've finally found someone I can be comfortable with...me!! Yes, me. I'm happy w/myself. There's a few things I'm still working on, but I'll get there. Thanks to you guys for helping me make one of the best decisions of my life. It was one of the hardest things a I ever had to overcome and I'm so glad that I didn't have to do it alone. Really not sure if I could have. In two weeks it'll be nine months out. As far as the stbxh goes...we still talk. Only b/c of the little one. But, the conversations are short and strictly about her. I can honestly say I'm over him. Thanks again for everything.
Anyway, first let me say Blue, you and Buff were right. I did need time to heal. I've taken it to. Gotta say I'm enjoying every minute of it. It's amazing how you forget who you are when someone else is controlling you. The kiddo's are doing great. All those anger problems they were having have almost faded completely away. With the help of some counseling. I've recently gotten approved for financial aid and will start school in Spring. Physical Therapy is what I'm leaning toward. As far as the divorce goes....still nothing. For the meantime I'm content. I'd love to get closure on this mess I made, but I've realized he's not really worth my worries. I have too many other things going on to think about it. It is moving though. Which is fine for the time being. Still living in my house...actually remodeling a little bit. I stay busy between working full time and being an over time single mommy. I gotta say I'm so much happier. I've finally found someone I can be comfortable with...me!! Yes, me. I'm happy w/myself. There's a few things I'm still working on, but I'll get there. Thanks to you guys for helping me make one of the best decisions of my life. It was one of the hardest things a I ever had to overcome and I'm so glad that I didn't have to do it alone. Really not sure if I could have. In two weeks it'll be nine months out. As far as the stbxh goes...we still talk. Only b/c of the little one. But, the conversations are short and strictly about her. I can honestly say I'm over him. Thanks again for everything.
Melissa

Bueno!
CL-Blueliner4
Mel
Yeah, I know.
CL-Blueliner4
GOOD for you! That's a great post to see--I feel like that on my good days, and it's great to know that the good days can just keep increasing. I've only been out three months, but you perfectly encapsulated how I feel (well, as I said, on the good days). CONGRATULATIONS! Blue's right, you do sound great!
CC
PS Blue, the shy thing---think about how powerful you are in this sphere, and see if you can carry it over. Not that I have the hang of any of this, but I gave a talk to slightly over 100 people today, for work, and what helped me do it was this: I'm ok and I know what I wanted to get across, so as long as I felt I did it, the other people's responses are really secondary. This may sound cold, but my thing was, I love my program and the work I do, I want people to know about it, and if I can get that across, I've won. And they did get it, and I got lots of compliments on it, which was lovely.
I'm thinking the same thing could be applied to you and your potential beau. You love your new self and you want him to know about you, and if you can convey that, his actual reaction is secondary (though the likelihood of him saying yes goes way up with a confident, fun delivery of an invitation from you).
I also may be whacked in the head, b/c after said talk I made the seven-hour drive home, with MUCH caffeine, but who knows? Idiot savant time, maybe. Confidence is sexy and compelling, and if you can translate the confidence and eloquence you show here into that interaction, you're golden.
CC