Visitation...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-02-2004
Visitation...
Sun, 03-06-2005 - 1:53pm

I've been out of the house for a week now... actually a week as of today. H has received the court summons (or whatever it's called) to appear for the custody hearing late next month. I still haven't received notification, but I figure that's most likely coming in tomorrow's mail. Well, I got the flip-flopping on Friday night about how he wants us (me and ds) to "come home" so the three of us can sit down and work this out as a family... then get the "don't start something you can't win" stuff from him... telling me that no judge in his right mind would give me custody of a 7 year old... and that he has copies of all my diaries, which provide proof of the affair during the marriage, and the two abortions I had before I met h.... and that he has copies of my medical records proving that I am mentally unstable.

Well, ds still doesn't want to see his father, and I tried to explain that to h. He wanted to take ds to see his ggrandmother since she's been ill, and hospitalized. Well, since h has been threatening to pick up Timothy from school, and not return him, I asked if maybe his mother would take him to see the ggrandmother. H's response was that if his mother picked up ds, she would not return him... so I then I told h that is not an option either, since that would traumatize ds more.

H ended up telling his mother that I wouldn't answer his calls (I don't answer, but I have called and talked to him every single day since I've left), and that I wouldn't let him see our son... and somehow either he or she suggested calling my Dad. So... mil called my Dad with her concerns about my not letting h see our son... and after a couple of back and forth phone calls between MIL and my Dad... and my Dad calling h (maybe someone else could have a rational conversation with him?)... well, it looks like we'll be able set up an interim agreement of every other weekend, and one evening a week. That's perfectly acceptable to me... I hope ds is okay with it. I know he won't like it at first, but he does need to see his father... and hopefully h can try to build a good relationship with him. H's big concern seems to be wanting to avoid having to show up in court, and wanted to know if I'd call off the court date if he agreed to the visitation arrangement... but at the same time, refused to sign anything. Sheesh.

So... we'll see what happens next.

Phoenix