When you know its not your fault

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2003
When you know its not your fault
8
Mon, 03-29-2004 - 6:15am
Ispent most of my evening in tears.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2003
Mon, 03-29-2004 - 9:11am
*lets out a primal scream*
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Mon, 03-29-2004 - 12:56pm

Kris, why don't you read it and just insert mother for abuser?

CL-Blueliner4

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2003
Mon, 03-29-2004 - 1:36pm

My father once told me she was in an institution when she was a small child, and said her adoptive parents were to blame.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Mon, 03-29-2004 - 1:49pm

It's been done, and I think that would be an EXCELLENT solution.

CL-Blueliner4

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2003
Mon, 03-29-2004 - 2:00pm
Thanks.

"Life is not measured by how many breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away." --George Carlin

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Mon, 03-29-2004 - 2:15pm

I'd loan you a spare stick and some pucks, but I think it would scare your dogs.


CL-Blueliner4

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2003
Mon, 03-29-2004 - 2:20pm
LOL. Yeah it most likely would. But thanks anyway Gabby!
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-26-2004
Mon, 03-29-2004 - 8:07pm
Gentle hugs to you wishful. I am so sorry that you are having a rough time right now.

"Why do abusers wish to make us miserable? When you know it isnt your fault, why does it still hurt? Why is it that no matter what, we the victims do, it is never right or good enough?"

I truly dont know why they do what they do. I think it is easier to understand when you read the Lundy Bancroft book...but even then it still boggles my mind. I think they feel they have the right to do this or maybe some of them are just so selfabsorbed that they dont care what they are doing to others...as long as they get what they want. And it hurts us because we have feelings....because words can hurt....actions can hurt. The adage that is used so ofted...Sticks and stone may break my bones but words can never hurt me....we know that really isnt true. That words can hurt very much. I think what we need to do is choose how we react to it and let it affect us. That at some point we will have to decide that no matter what they say we just will not give them the satisfaction of a reaction...especially the reaction that they have conditioned us to give them. To not let them have that control over us.

Again hugs to you lady...take care of yourself,

Ree