Whooo hooooooooo!! Fancy Stuff here Girl

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Whooo hooooooooo!! Fancy Stuff here Girl
Wed, 03-26-2003 - 12:47am
this looks weird but sophisticated too.........hope i dont miss anyone's posts.......

i cried all day today and all night. I am up now because i cant sleep.......once again..........45 minutes and I am up.......................

Im exhausted,physically and emotionally...............

Hoping you ladies are getting some sleep right now, because I wouldnt want anyone to be in my shoes when all have so much to deal with.

Hugs, Pam

Avatar for cl_mizlizzy
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Wed, 03-26-2003 - 1:00am
Zen, I know this is a very rough time right now, and we ALL can relate, probably more than you know. Please, take extra good care of yourself right now, and lean as hard as you need to. This is an adjustment period, and yes, it is rough... but, it is also a very necessary change, for you and your children.

IF you can, will you please try to find a positive in this--for you and your children? I hope that may bring some comfort. If you think back to all the sleepless nights, pain and turmoil while your stbx was still there, along with all he has said and done since you began seeking help, maybe that will help you too gain that perspective, so you can continue to move forward. Some days are just rough and hard, and if you need to just veg out, do it, and don't you dare let ANYone, especially YOU create a sense of guilt. You have dealt with so much, and you are really doing so well with everything, even though it is overwhelming some days.

Please, keep hanging on tightly, and KNOW we all care, so much, and we all are here for you, every single step of the way.

I hope you can get some rest tonight! I need to try to unwind too...LOL I appreciate every single person here! We are SO blessed, with this forum (even if this new format is something else ;) to adjust to...but we can and will do it, *together*.


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 03-26-2003 - 8:00am
Oh, Zen,

I know exactly what you're going through, because I felt those emotions before so many times. It seems impossible to have to deal with those, but yet when you're with H it's impossible to deal with that, too. To make a long story short, H's family and I used to get along really well (except for a brother who's just plain mean), but he has said so much and told so many lies that we don't even speak anymore. Well, I can't live like this - always having to deal with him and his family as one big happy bunch. I always went out of the way for them - the out-of-towners always stayed at my house, all holiday meals were at my house, etc., so I really feel stabbed in the back. I told him today that he'd chosen who was important to him and it's impossible for me to live like this so it's time we did something about it. I'm hoping when I go home this afternoon he'll have everything gone. I know there's a better life, and once we get past the stage you're in now it's got to be better. I know you can do it. I've seen so much change in you since the beginning. Whether you think so or not, you sound so much more sure of yourself. You, like me, haven't had so much of a life for the past several years - just living in limbo and letting someone else tell us what we can and can't do.

Sending you a hug,


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 03-26-2003 - 8:22am
Awww Pam, I'm sorry you're going through this. Just know you're in my thoughts and prayers.


Avatar for aria_mom
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 03-26-2003 - 11:24am
Hey Pam we are riding the same rollercoaster, only I think I am farther down the track LOL. I am up and down too and it has taken me two years to finally feel like I can see the end. Just hang in there hon. I know that is so hard to hear when you probably just want to lie down and rest, I know I do. And I hear you about the nights with little sleep. But have faith you are strong and you are on the right path! Super hugs and take a breather for yourself, be good and get the rest as much as you can, HUgs Debi
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-2003
Wed, 03-26-2003 - 12:26pm
Awww, Zen, I understand these feeling SO well, the loss of sleep and the whole thing. Bless your heart, I do know how rough it is and sometimes it just feels like it's never going to get any better, but I promise, I promise, I promise, it will. Hang on tight, it took almost a year for me to start having consistency to my feelings and be able to feel good about life for more than just a few days. The healing process is definitely tough, but if you can just stick it out, there is SO much growth and self discovery in it, that it is more than worth the rough ride.

We're here for you girlfriend, I hope you get some rest today!