How do I know if this is God's will?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2005
How do I know if this is God's will?
Thu, 07-13-2006 - 6:40pm

3 yrs ago my inlaws moved two hrs away from us on the other side of the state (Gd Rapids area in MI). We are close to them, so it has been hard to have them farther away, esp now that we have a 9 mo old. They miss him SOOO much and have always told us we should move out there. My MIL keeps telling me that she also wants us out there so she can watch Morgan full time free while we work. I know she would too. We usually see them once a month and it is a nice getaway when we spend time out there. It is a much nicer area and is growing a lot. There are A LOT more jobs out there and better opportunities. Our side of the state seems to be going downhill. My DH and I have tossed around the idea before. Part of me doesn't want to leave my parents and family, but it isn't like we'd be moving that far. I know that if it meant that we would have a better life, they'd want that for us.

My DH and I both have BA's and I have a pretty good paying job that I enjoy most of the time. My DH works about 45 min away because he can't find anything in our area. And the job he does have isn't that great and not what he wants to be doing with his degree. Trouble is, there is NOTHING around here. If I look online in my inlaws area there are tons of ads for jobs. We have a small older house in a decent neighborhood, but the school system is not where I would want Morgan to go at all. We are putting some money away for his college and our retirement, but not nearly what we probably should. We do what we can. We have had our student loans in deferrment for awhile because paying them back is going to be rough since we have so much and we've been hoping that maybe my DH will find a job that pays more. We have an ok savings, but it seems we can't get it where we want it to be. I'm not saying we're poor, but we definately could be doing better.

Most of me really wants to run with this and move out of here. I think the only thing that keeps us here is my side of the family, and the fact that we have an awesome church and group of friends that we have a lot in common with. But it's not like we wouldn't see them again...just not as much. Sometimes I think maybe there is a reason my DH parents moved...maybe God has a plan for us that we can't see yet. Seems like I forget about it for awhile but the desire always comes back when I think about the fact that our life would probably be so much better out there.

I know it will be A LOT of work to relocate. I'm not sure what the process would be...selling/buying houses and getting jobs. My inlaws have said that we can always stay with them in between getting a new house.

So basically what it comes down to is this...should we stay where we are "comfortable" and continue with our somewhat difficult situation (which will be worse when we have to start paying st loans back next year!)...where my family and our good friends are...or do we take a leap of faith and move where we will most likely have better jobs, free child care (one on one for our son vs day care) and probably nicer things?? This would really be a big undertaking, but I just can't stop thinking that it is probably in our best interest. And if it I keep having this desire, how do I know if it is God?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Thu, 07-13-2006 - 8:20pm

welcome to the board!

I'd say you probably already know the answer to that. Have you been praying about it? Have you asked God to give you desires for His will for your life? If you have then its clear. God says he will grant you the desires of your heart, if you line up your will to His.

God Bless, I will be praying for you!!!

"I know my plans for you"declares the Lord. "Plans to prosper you,

"I know my plans for you"declares the Lord. "Plans to prosper you,  and not to harm you. Plans to give you hope and a future" Jeremiah 29:11

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-14-2004
Thu, 07-13-2006 - 11:09pm
I second the need for prayer. We made a radical move. I know it was God's will for us to go, but the road we thought would be roses was more like barbed wire. However we did have to go through that to get to where we are now...ocean side. I can tell you that when it is God's will you will know that you know. All doors will open and you can go. If you keep hitting brick walls, it is probably just a not now.



You can't change the past, but you can ruin the present by worrying over the future.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-15-2001
Fri, 07-14-2006 - 9:43am

I struggle with this question all the time, but the only thing we can do is pray about decisions. I would also advise looking into a few of the jobs out where your in-laws live. If an amazing opportunity opens up for you or your husband, you just might have your answer!


iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2003
Fri, 07-14-2006 - 7:30pm
Welcome to the board.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2003
Fri, 07-14-2006 - 8:52pm
From my study with "Experiencing God" I learned that you need to pray, need to go with what you know to be true (what you know of the bible), and need wise christian counsel when making a decision regarding the "will of God". I live about half way between Lansing and Flint so I understand the job issues in our state and I know GR pretty good and it is a great place to live. My caution is to really consider if you are seeking the will of God or the security of money because we can't serve both God and money. I am a full-time college student living on my husband's SSI and child support so I so understand money struggles and there is a lot I could legally and morally justify doing that would make my situation so much easier but the prayers, the bible, the counsel of my pastor, and my heart tells me that these are not the actions God wants me to take. I am not saying moving is wrong, I am just cautioning against going for money. Consider how the move benefits the kingdom of God? This is afterall our purpose for living. Please keep us updated on what you decide to do.
Good Luck,
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2006
Wed, 09-20-2006 - 5:42pm

From your post you have kind of already made that decision for yourself, I do agree just prepare don't move with out jobs secured and a church to go to. It seems as though your doing alot of questioning about it so your a little unsure, what do your parents think have you tried going to your current pastor and having him pray with you, the bible say that if two or more agree then it shall be done on earth as it is in heaven.

Usually Gods plan falls completely in place for you, so continue to pray on it and read your bible and let your heart lead u to the answer.

HTH, Jami

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-11-2006
Thu, 10-05-2006 - 10:57am

Pray about it and TRUST GOD! I can't relate to your situation, so it seems silly to offer advice other than that.

He will open doors and present opportunities that you maybe never expected! Always seek God in every situation; He will never fail us! He hasn't yet!

And remember - God never promised the road would be easy, but He does promise you will never have to do it alone!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-11-2004
Thu, 02-01-2007 - 10:33am


I can't believe you are going through this right now. I am in the exact same situation except one step ahead of where you are. My DH and I are considering relocating to WA from VA. We're actually doing more than considering - we're applying to jobs and interviewing already. DH's family lives in WA and we have visited them twice since they've been there. DH and I fell in love with the area (Kitsap County near the Puget Sound) and decided we wanted to move there ourselves. So, now that we both have finished college and are no longer tied down to anything here in VA (except that my family lives here), we are trying to move. I just recently have been overwhelmed with the question of "Is this God's will?" While we are moving more for the better schools, less crime, and beauty of the area, we are not moving for the prospect of making more money. DH has a great job here in VA and has the immediate opportunity to be promoted, but we have made the decision to move for the well-being of our son and his future by moving to the safer, more educated area in WA. He does have several companies interviewing him right now and the pay would be great, but still not AS great as it would be if he were to stay here.

So, DH and I talked about this issue last night. I asked him if he thinks this is God's will and he said he has the feeling that it will be good for us. He said he has prayed about it a lot and feels that we're doing the right thing. I'm sure that he really has prayed about it, but I'm not so sure that he has waited for an answer from God as opposed to just reasoning with himself and coming to the conclusion that it's right. I, on the other hand, have received no obvious answer as to whether or not we should relocate, and have decided to fast to hear God more clearly. I have heard that many of God's followers in the Bible received answers to their questions by truly giving themselves to God and letting him provide for them completely, and that they did that by fasting. I'll stop fasting after three days (through Saturday), so I'm hoping he will reveal something to me in that time.

I really emphathize with you and know your frustration with this. DH and I really do not like where we live anymore, either - the crime is so bad now, the schools are getting worse, the traffic is just awful and getting worse, and the housing market is shameful. I truly cannot see a good reason, besides my family being here, to stay. BUT, as much as I would love to move, and the chances of us moving soon are really good, I don't want to make such a decision without knowing it's what God wants. I realize we should have consulted him before ever deciding to start applying for jobs in the first place, but we're not at the point of no return. We haven't accepted any jobs or bought a house, so we're not committed yet. But DH is probably going to fly out for a job interview next week and come back with an offer, so this is kind of a pressing matter. Since the opportunities for jobs have presented themselves, does that mean God thinks it's ok to go? I'm confused but am trying to listen to what God is saying.

Good luck to you and your search for an answer. I'll be praying for you.

Mommy to Matthew, 4/21/04


Mommy to Matthew  4/21/04


iVillage Member
Registered: 05-15-2003
Sat, 02-10-2007 - 12:35am
A little over a year ago, I spent a long weekend at The Cove in Asheville for a seminar with Beth Moore. Some of the discussion was concerning how we know when we are in God's will when we make decisions and how we discern our own selfish desires from His Will. Thought you might enjoy these notes Beth shared on how to know decisions are The Spirit's leading rather than our own desires.

Challenges to the obedience of the Holy Spirit of Christ's promptings:

1- Decisions based on our relationship with God rather than on rugulations (the law) Psalm 103 (prayer)

2- Decisions will NEVER contradict or cause us to compromise scripture. The Spirit never leads us in any direction that would be against what Christ teaches. {I have to pour out (confessions, concerns) before I can be "filled up" with the Spirit of Christ.}
2 Peter 1: 19 - 21

3- The Spirit's promptings differ from feelings and emotions. Natural instinct, female intuition have nothing to do with the Holy Spirit. Is this God's will or just something I want? Let the emotions die down and avoid the compulsion to act on emotion or make the decision based on emotion. Patience!!!! Hebrews 4:12, Jude 19

4- Everything is permissable to me but not beneficial to me. Decision based on the Will of God will lead to freedom not to bondage. 2 Corinthians 3: 12 - 18 (When awaking in the night with a strong urge to pray for someone -- Spirit calling us as intercessors.)

5- The decision will ultimately make us more loving not less loving to those around us. God is love; He does not, cannot give us a mean spirit. Loving people (family), loving God is what it is all about!
Philippians 1: 9 - 10

6- There will be PEACE! Where God is in authority, the WILL BE PEACE in our HEARTS. (not necessarily in our LIVES as others --the world -- challenge our decision to follow the Holy Spirit of Christ.)