inlaws HATE me
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inlaws HATE me
| Wed, 02-28-2007 - 10:56pm |
My inlaws have NEVER liked me. Don't know why, they just never have. Last year they planned a trip with my SIL's and their families on my daughter's 1st birthday. GRRRR. Since then we continue to have problems. They are Constantly doing things with SIL's and their families and rarely do things with ours. They even dismissed my husbands and my 5 year anniver. Mind you they had dinner parties for the SIL's and sent a card with money to my BIL and his wife on theirs. To make things even more upsetting, my BIL and his wife are expecting their first child in July. It is a boy and my FIL is soooo excited he can hardley contain himself and probably peed his pants with joy when he found out. When we had our son my inlaws were at the circus with my SIL's and thier kids. When we had our second they were less than enthused and told anyone that would listen that there was no way we could afford it. GRRRR. How do I deal with these people? I do I get past the anger and resentment that has built up and continues to build?

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It sucks to be ignored, not liked and have others favored so blatantly.
Here is what I would do. Ignore them. Disengage. Don't contact them about anything, don't send photos, act like they don't exist. Sounds like they wouldn't miss you anyway. I would not keep trying. Because your child is going to notice and get very hurt. So, let them have their "golden child" and her little family. Since they ignore you guys and act like like you don't exist, let them have their wish. No more son, DIL and grandchild.
Their loss, honey.
Tell your children that sometimes people favor others. That Grandma and Grandpa have problems and that sometimes, their cousins will get to do more than they will.
You can still disengage. They will learn what is what.
As far as your ILS badmouthing you to other people, I would confront them and tell them that it is unacceptable. That since they ignore you, except to disparage you to others, that you suggest they go back to their little pathetic world where SIL is the golden child and leave you alone.
Okay, now you have my curiosity piqued.
If your inlaws are so nasty to you and ignore your children, WHY on Earth would you even bother to go to the party?
Sure your kids may be disappointed not to go, but I would rather there be disappointment than blatant outright favoritism going on right in their faces.
Kids are fairly resilient. They can be told that even with family, some people are nice and others are not.
If you continue to take the abuse, they will continue to inflict it.
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