Me Again

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2003
Me Again
4
Tue, 04-01-2003 - 8:27pm
I just want to thank you guys for being there for me. When crap goes down with my boyfriend's family, I often have no one to talk to because no one understands or cares for that matter. And I am left to suffer alone. My boyfriend's mother and father are starting to come around. His mother is making an effort to accept me, and my boyfriend revealed that his father doesn't have anything against me.

I'm guessing that Daddy goes along with stuff to keep the peace. However, Satan, my boyfriend's sister, is at it again. Recently my boyfriend's mother mentioned that they should consider getting cellphones so he could call me in Chicago. Well little sis said, "Why does he have to call Chicago? There is no reaaaaaaaaaaaason to call Chicago."

I pretended like I wasn't upset because all my life I've had to be the strong one. But man was I dying inside. I wanted to yell and scream and tell his little sis where to stick it. But I can't because she is so far away, and would it really matter? And plus, I am too nice. I know why his sis is lashing out at me, and I feel sorry for her. But I can only feel sorry for her for so long. Rage is building up inside of me, and eventually I'm going to have to let it out or go ghetto : )

Someone asked if my boyfriend's fam had racial issues since he is white, and I am black. I truly want to say in my heart that they have no racial issues because they have raised a fine son, but I don't know. I'm sure I'll be back soon to add more to this soap opera.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 04-02-2003 - 11:34am
WHY DOES HIS SISTER HAVE ISSUES WITH YOU?? SHE SOUNDS LIKE MY BF'S NIECE. THIS LITTLE WITCH ACTUALLY TOLD MY BF TO CHOSE BETWEEN ME AND HER. HIS NIECE HAS STOLE MONEY FROM ME, MY CAR AND DROVE IT 5 STATES AWAY AND HAS EVEN BAD MOUTHED ME.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2003
Wed, 04-02-2003 - 5:18pm
She's jealous of the relationship point blank. She has never really done the relationship thing, and she expects everyone to die lonely and miserable like her.

Now I have heard the saying that when someone hates you, there is something that they admire about you. In this case (I haven't told my boyfriend this,) I think she admires my strength for doing what I want to do in life. I don't think she is happy with her life, career, etc. So to make herself feel better she rains on my parade.

The reasons she says she hates me: I want to have an epidural if I have children, I don't want to breastfeed, and supposedly I have some animosity towards whites based on some comments I said at their house. The first two, that is just plain stupid. I'm 23 years old, and I haven't really thought about mommy stuff yet. And that is pretty damn good, especially since a lot of African American girls like myself end up with a child before 15.

The last point, yes I did make some comments about race at their house. I mentioned some of the racism I experienced in Mexico while I was there, racism Tiger Woods' father faced when he was in the service, and a comment about Scots-Irish people owning slaves because I have a Scottish last name.

From that they gathered that I am racist against white people. That is so far from the truth. My step-dad is white, I was raised in and all white community, all my friends are white except for one. And I have a tendency to date white men. My former fiance was white. I JUST LOVE WHITE PEOPLE TO DEATH : ) And I also forgot, why the hell would I be dating their white son and putting up with their white crap, if I truly hated white people? Some people are just insane.



iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Thu, 04-03-2003 - 8:44am
They may have their own racial biases and issues, even though they may not have passed them down to their son. What does your bf say about it?

It looks like they are at least trying, which I think is a good thing. As far as his sister goes, I wouldn't worry too much about her. She sounds like a nutcase.

I know what you mean about being the stronger person. In the end, you will be on top because you have been the bigger person with his sister, even though she has gone out of her way to make comments to you. People will notice that you don't say anything back. The comments she makes is a reflection of HERSELF and not you or anyone else. So everytime she makes a comment, she is letting people know who she really is.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2002
Thu, 04-03-2003 - 12:10pm
Honey, every time she makes a remark like that , you WIN. she is jealous.

Hug Dh,. stroke his cheak. Sit in his lap when you are around her.

Next time she makes a remark like that, smile to yourself. Here are some comebacks, if you like:

"Gee, I have no idea why he would want to conatct ME."

"As you have never been in love SIL, you can't understand."

"DH can't LIVE without contact with me."

If you want to really CALL her on her behavior, you can use this:

"Meow SIL? Just a tad jealous?"