Mil belive everything,almost.........

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-21-2006
Mil belive everything,almost.........
15
Fri, 01-26-2007 - 5:59pm
I don't understand why my IL's thing
everyhting bad that is happing in
my marriage is my fault. They want
me to get a job but it seems as soon
as I get a job I end up losing it becuz
something happens or his schdule screws
things up. My husband has been fired twice
from the same job the second time around
he was fired for being supected of stealing
money and he was and in the end he was taking
large amounts of money and saying sexual comments
to alot of the young girls that worked there.
While
thankfully none of these girls pushed it and filed
sexual harrasment against him or the company didn't
try to file charges on him for stealing money. He
has told the IL's that I called his boss and made up
a lie that he was stealing money and of course the
IL's belive him. They get mad at me becuz I
get jobs and lose them as quick as I get them.
He has them convinced that I am not a good mother
and don't do anything around the house which is
totally untrue. I just feel like everyone is ganging
up on me and I feel alone. I'm sick of him being able
to just tell them whatever and they just belive him
so easily. They don't understand how we are so behind
on bills and blame me and think I was spending all the
money and he spend way more money than I did. I think
the MIL is jealous of me becuz I go out sometimes. I
won't let a man tell me what I can and can't do just
becuz I am married and have kids.
I
just wish they really new the truth about it all. If
you made it this far thanks for reading this.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-21-2006
Sat, 02-03-2007 - 7:53pm
No I don't have any family or friends
that would want to deal with two kids.
I read the emails becuz if the il's
talk him into leaving me I would like
to know about it. One of the emails I
see from my husband said he wanted to
pretend to take our daughter to school
and end up at the Il's house 10 hours
away. I am sure that if he didn't come
back in an hours or two I would figure
out where he went. I checked into this
with the police and they told me he can
just take her and so could I becuz neither
of us have legal custody.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-22-2004
Sun, 02-04-2007 - 9:45am
I wish I had some way to help you. I think that you've got to start putting together some sort of an emergency plan in case he does this. You might also want to notify the school about this in case your daughter doesn't end up there one day, so that the school could notify you immediately. It seems like you've got 2 problems (aside from the ILs). One, that he might take your daughter away, and two, that he has broken the law. I don't mean to sound harsh, but I think that you've got to start somehow planning what you will do if he takes your daughter or gets in trouble with the law. Is there anything you can do to get him back on track? If I were you, I would consider leaving him before things get worse. Things may seem bad now, but it sounds like they could get a lot worse. Is there an organization that helps abused women near you? I don't mean that he is physically abusing you, but he is definitely putting you in a sticky situation, and the services that they provide might be helpful. Good luck.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-21-2006
Mon, 02-05-2007 - 7:04pm
I have already talked to the social worker
about my him running off with our daughter.
She said and the police said that if he does
there is nothing they can do and I can do the
same to him. I don't think he is going to be
taking money anymore at least I hope not!!!
I also
asked the social worker at my dd school if
he arranged for the in laws to pick her up
from school and run off 10 hrs away
if he could do that and she said
no and she would call me A/S/A/P and call
the police.. The grand parents can't just run
off with her without my knowledge even thou lord
knows I know they would love to.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-24-2006
Tue, 02-06-2007 - 8:50am

If I missed it in this thread, I apologize... but how old are your kids? And what shift does your husband work?

I think things have gotten serious enough now that you need a strategy that will include you being able to support yourself and your kids, and of course, to protect them from being stolen away.

And I was curious about the social worker you spoke of. Can she help you get on your feet, independent of your H? What kind of social worker is she? I can't believe that she didn't give you more answers once she found out your H is considering taking the children and not coming back.

I'm concerned about you all.

zz

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-21-2006
Thu, 02-08-2007 - 7:25pm
I'd rather not give out certain info about
my family please forgive me but you never
know who may pop in on one of these boards
and read my posts. They are to young to be
home alone. The social worker is the one
at my dd school. She can only do so much.
She can't do everything that a regular social
worker can do. If there is really big problems
in a family or belives children are being harmed
she has to turn a family into DFS. She has helped
me out alot. She can't legally do anything nor
can I if my husband runs off with my dd I have
talked to the police about it. The only way I
can do something about it is if I have partial
or all legal custody of her.


Edited 2/20/2007 5:15 pm ET by broken07

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