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|Thu, 03-27-2003 - 3:45pm|
Shortly after he read the e-mail exchange, she sent him an e-mail explaining that she was mad at me. He responded, telling her that she misunderstood what I had said to her. He also told her that her comments to me were very rude and uncalled for. She responded to him with a nasty e-mail. (We thought about just calling her, but decided that it would be best to e-mail her so we'd have a record of what was said.) She mentioned in the e-mail that she didn't believe there ever was a misunderstanding.
We are both very irritated that she thinks we're both lying about the situation. We're more irritated that she ever thought it was acceptable to talk about me to my DH. We told her that and she responded with more hateful comments, this time they were about my DH. We seem to think that part of her problem has to do with her being jealous of our marriage, but we're just not sure. Some of the things she has sound make it sound as though she thinks I have taken him away from her. She'd made comments like, ". i know her as someone that married my brother and lives w/ him in and i never get to see him." She's also made comments like," maybe it is selfish of me b/c u love more, but , don't just give it all to her. realize that there is still me and others left that would like a little too."
I've tried my best to include her because she is my sister-in-law and because I know she looks up to my DH. I've spent hours some nights, both over the phone and online, helping her with her chemistry. I'd call her when she was sick. I'd send her e-mails asking how she was doing, and telling her what was going on with us. When my DH and I were dating, we'd occasionally take her out to eat and to movies with us. It's not like I've ignored her or anything like that, so that's why I don't understand her attitude towards me.
She and my DH were never very close when they lived at home. My DH has been out of his parents' house for over five years. He and the sister mentioned are seven years apart; she's 19 and he is 26. They have one other sister who is 23. She gets along with her sister about 50% of the time, while she hasn't argued with my DH until now.
The described incident happened a couple of months ago, and we're obviously still upset about it. I've told her over and over that I am sorry that I hurt her feelings. I have told her over and over that she misunderstood me, but she just doesn't want to believe that for some reason. (She told me that she likes conflict; I don't know if that has anything to do with all of this or not.) She has never once said she was sorry about the stuff she said to either my DH or to me. That's something I don't quite get either. So, for now, we're stopped making contact with her. We're not sure what else to do. Any ideas?