First post in the new folder: DIL-DIL

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
First post in the new folder: DIL-DIL
Sun, 10-24-2004 - 3:55pm
What advice would you give other DILs in handling their MILs and FILs??? Anything that would suggest another DIL *not* do??? Or something that she should do?
daisyPath Anniversary
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2004
Mon, 10-25-2004 - 12:56pm
Be careful what you say about you DH to your MIL, because your MIL will always stick up for her son, even if he is in the wrong. If you need advice or someone to talk to, talk to a friend.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-21-2004
Tue, 10-26-2004 - 12:13pm
I think a hugs thing that I would not do is get to close. Let the main relationship stay between DH or DW and their DM. My SIL on my side (married to my brother) is always very polite when call to talk to my DB, casual conversation, but she never calls here to just shoot the bull with us. That is my DB's responsibility.

I on the other hand used to call my MIL once a week to check in and see how all were. That was a big mistake because now my MIL knows the difference and has one more thing to hold against me.

Moral of this is always try to be nice, but don't act as if you are best friends, it can only lead to trouble in the long run.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2004
Sat, 10-30-2004 - 5:37pm
I don't post here often but I have a great relationship with MIL and I think it's because we put ourselves in the other's shoes at times. I have only been married a year but I am closer to her than I am to my own mother (long story lol) anyway she kind of pushed some buttons at first but I don't think it was intentional at all. She had alot of things to get used to a year ago, her oldest just got married and got deployed all within two weeks so I just told myself that she had to get used to him being married and she hadn't really gotten the chance to do that because he was here and then he was gone almost over night. I was worried about what was going to happen when he came home for two weeks over the summer, I didn't know if she was going to want to delegate his time or anything like that but she was awesome about it! she didn't get overbearing and she would wait for us to call her and ask her what was going on that day. I think if everyone would try to be understanding of eachother then we could all get along lol.