Accused of Being Petty and Scrooge Like

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-12-2011
Accused of Being Petty and Scrooge Like
25
Mon, 12-26-2011 - 2:43pm

For the pass 25 years my 2 sisters and I who reside in the same state have had our own family tradition of spending Xmas together.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-12-2011
Mon, 12-26-2011 - 11:28pm

Sometimes, but usually she shows up empty handed, which is something that has annoyed us for years but we over looked it as not to start something on Xmas day.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2010
Mon, 12-26-2011 - 11:33pm
Does she have limited funds??

San
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2009
Mon, 12-26-2011 - 11:48pm
<< She will even drop her son off at my son's b'day party with no gift. >>

I never expected gifts at my son's b.d. parties. I just wanted people to come.

Why are you still hanging onto this?

 

Avatar for cfk_3
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-1999
Tue, 12-27-2011 - 11:48am
I would have given them their gifts. If a year went by with no contact, I might reconsider the sentiment come Xmas 2012.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-12-2011
Tue, 12-27-2011 - 8:06pm

She makes good money, wears designer clothes, drives an expensive SUV and lives rent free in one of her mom's rental properties. Whereas I am disabled and live on a fixed income.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-12-2011
Tue, 12-27-2011 - 8:43pm

I was

Avatar for deenow17
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2004
Wed, 12-28-2011 - 10:32am
Whether or not you chose to give a gift is your personal decision. I'm just wondering if you really didn't give the gift because you didn't want to and if you are using their not being there as the "excuse". Do you only give Xmas gifts to those who come to your Xmas party? If so, then ok but if that isn't a requirement for all of your gift giving then just be honest & tell your sister that you decided not to give her grandkids gifts this year as their Mother is rude & rarely provides gifts in return.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-29-2002
Wed, 12-28-2011 - 12:50pm

Given the information you provided, I most likely would have not put together the gifts as well.

Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-08-2009
Wed, 12-28-2011 - 5:53pm

I agree that it is extremely tacky to show up to a child's birthday party and not bring a gift.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2009
Wed, 12-28-2011 - 7:53pm
<< It's all noble to say that you aren't expecting a gift and just their company is enough blah blah blah but frankly that just isn't how it goes. >>

Actually, that "is" how it goes in certain places. I guess not where you and the OP live, nor in your circles... but here in my rural part of Texas, and the people I hang with, that "is" how it goes.

<< I wouldn't go to a wedding or baby shower and not bring a gift for the same reasons. >>

We don't generally take gifts to the wedding, but instead they are given in advance or afterwards.

To each their own, I guess. But for for me, I'd never look down on a child who came to another child's b.d. party without a gift, nor their parents. Lots of us truly do care only about their showing up to celebrate with us, not a tit-for-tat attitude.

Maybe you consider that noble, and maybe it is.